I’d vote for Tomsula but I suspect he’s already being recruited by Lifehacker.

I’m a Lions fan who has now lived in the Philadelphia area for over 20 years. The last time the Lions played here (in the middle of a fucking blizzard in 2013) the Eagles fans in the section I was sitting in didn’t bother to even heckle me, THEY BOUGHT ME A SYMPATHY BEER

that narc would be perfect for this 

Aw, heck.

Lemme tell you, I have made a SHITLOAD of money working from home (this bit is false) and would love to edit this for you. Not that I really understand what that entails (this bit is true). I think I’ve also just demonstrated a solid grasp of what is fact and what is fiction, which I sort of assume may be a part of an…

Run you stupid fucking ombudsman! Run!

You’re close; the Cubs winning the World Series is what opened a tear in the spacetime continuum

Ask jeffvanhungry if Gary can do it.

Bill Simmons

I thought Peter Thiel already was your Public Editor.

Why not Wizard Cat?

I’ll do it. Actually, I’ll subcontract it out to my dog.

Matt Patricia looks like he has a closet full of shirts arranged by which type of food stains they have on them.

marchman

Almost what I said right after the 2016 election, and still applies sometimes:

Fuck, man. Not even a token “NO MAGARY IM NOT WRITING ABOUT THESE FUCKS” from ZMF this year. It’s like Christmas without Santa.

Reading this article is probably the happiest I’ll be during this Lions season. Imagine being the fan of a franchise and the happiest you know you’ll be during the entire football season is reading a Drew Magary piece in freakin’ July.

All I have to say right now is, frankly, it’s amazing to me that WYTS 2019 has been going on for over a week now and still hasn’t gotten to Cleveland

Woman that was dating 20 men gets mad at man that is dating two. 

The Jags are the Giants’ “white trash beach town outlet store”.