Counterpoint: it replaces everything with blind rage

Seconded. That baby was just evil.

Apparently FSU does too and that’s somehow even stupider.

4-4 I WAS TIRED OK

Remember when online dating was legitimately terrifying? Like you were absolutely convinced you were going to either lose a kidney or get Catfished every time, made even more hilarious by the fact that the word catfish wasn’t even INVENTED until 2010.

No one is ready for Sexy Tomsula.

If the Yankees want to take a nail gun to their own balls though, I am not sad about that.

In his defense, Lonzo is 19 years old - barely anything resembling an adult and not really having any experience at anything outside the bubble of hype that is his relentlessly bloviating father?

I mean it’s unpaved and gross but the businesses are functioning.

First: ‘going pear shaped’ is also a phrase that describes when something goes awry, like a tumor literally wrapping itself around your goddamn brain.

Y’know I was all set to argue that no, in fact, DC area is an obnoxious hellhole filled with inhuman drones who work for:

As a filthy new york hipster I resent this.

Weird shit like a star player going down with a horrifying injury before even a quarter in on the season opener?

While I appreciated the Superman IV’ing of the Warriors it would also have been just as funny to have ‘accidentally’ omitted them from this listing entirely.

So if I want to go see the Knicks flail around in an exercise of depressing futility I should leave my laptop case at work? Great.

There’s an article at The Ringer* about parity in the NFL finally being a reality.

She mixes 3 different kinds of cereal together and pours them into a bowl until there’s a mound roughly 1 inch higher than the bowl. Then she eats it with a spoon, dry and crunching loudly the whole while.

... are you my girlfriend?

I said something dumb about looking forward to the “good” comment roundup and now can’t figure out how to delete it so you get this filler text instead.

What you say is “I watched the tape”