As a person who owned a business, the people whose influence actually drives sales have between 300-9,000 followers. When you’re over that, it’s all white noise to your followers. You’re just a 24 hour commercial channel. Someone with 2,000 followers who leaves a glowing review of a place, though? You almost always…

“And then when I put on the dress my father thought I was my dead mother and he got so distracted that he forgot to lock the tiger cage and my brother got mauled to death. Still the best dress I ever found at a thrift store!”

Yelp, like FaceBook, needs to be launched into the sun. Their entire purpose is to extort businesses into paying them to get more recognition. At my current job they called constantly asking for money. Fuck ‘em!

Good to know it wasn’t just me.

The last one is a big fat nope. NOPE.

Ugh, I NEED to know where the spot was in Lassen.

The scary bit of that story was wearing something from a thrift store without washing it first *shudder*

Thank god I’m not the only one who thought that story sounded super humblebraggy on top of obviously fake. “lol I’m so quirky and I drive across the country specifically to visit different small-town thrift shops. Also I’m very pretty and so petite that normal people clothes don’t fit me teehee isn’t that cute?”

This leads us to one question....is Joe Flacco an elite backup quarterback?

Neat.

Preeeeeach. You can always tell. Oh DID he confess to the murder in front of a stranger and the girl’s close relative? Cool. Totally plausible.

Um, excuse me, our Lord and Savior rescued her from a demonic ouija cult.  Show some respect!

The thrift store one was written straight out of 1980's Halloween episode of Growing Pains.  I would’ve eaten that shit up as a child.

Truly the MPDG of stories.

Yes, I didn’t even think of that, but you’re absolutely right. It’s just a bad story on top of it. 

I’m disappointed by how many of these are obviously fake this year :( 

My thought too.

The thrift store story is so obviously fiction. So obviously self glorifying fanfic (egofic?). There were better, more believable stories.

I didn't believe the thrift store story at all. It seems like complete fiction. 

After all, it was nearly 20 years ago that he Hoovered up an entire building full of poltergeists in the original Luigi’s Mansion