Floyd never saves anything for the hike back.

and it’s against the rapidly deflating Browns.

Wouldn’t it be the Portland Frailblazers?

I’ve never heard of WD-40 being used for this. Will it not leave a grease stain afterwards?

So now we’re shitting on people for reaching the right conclusion but not being super aware of world events in their 20's. Just wanna be clear on this. That’s our new bar. You suck if you didn’t know about stuff in your 20's that you should have. 

I vote to actually make these names canon.

I’m so sick of all these remakes and reboots. The original version of The President’s Neck Is Missing starring Troy McClure isn’t perfect but it has a special place in a lot of people’s hearts and it doesn’t need a remake. I don’t get why they changed the name, either, is the whole president missing in this version…

Good job preemptively naming Bo Jackson, and can we also stipulate Barry Sanders?

No.  Manute Bol

I fully expect multiple Deadspin headlines this year that feature some combination of the words “Zion” “slam” and “to hell.”

I’ll never understand the mentality that made this show. “Let’s take what’s widely considered one of the worst parts of either of our other two shows--surly teens--and make a whole show just out of that!” 

“They opened up an investigation and suspended the season after a week? How could these simple country bumpkins, who only know football and how to till the land possibly make this kind of call so quickly? Surly, they don’t understand things like sexual assault. Why, they are most likely still startled by the daily…

I can confidently say that I have never attempted to be an influencer.  And yet, here I am, saying that I don’t think it’s a real job.  Does it involve work?  Yes.  Does it involve making money?  Yes.  But is it valuable, useful, helpful, or necessary?  No.

Any excuse for Bill Hader is a good excuse

If she’d gone to IHOP she’d still get the Shooty Stooly Fresh and Fruity.

“if you can’t stand the Heat” what!?

He looks like every apprentice Plumber I’ve ever seen my main guy bring around on jobs to yell at in Polish.

The fuck??

Capaldi is playing the famously cheery and optimistic Mr Micawbe, which is certainly going against type. Hopefully he finds a way to still be extremely vulgar and verbally abusive.

Those vacuums’ll take your dick right off. You don’t wanna have sex with them.