This is why I can’t understand dungeon crawlers or loot shooters or other games that make the grind the whole game. There’s a cadence and rhythm to stories/songs/games that teases you along and this totally obliterates it so you’re just doing the same mindless task over and over. Even non-grind games can fall into…

Holy shit this gif! Who but Dolan could make Pfizer Ad a genre of music the way that Former Pizza Hut is a style of architecture?

I firmly believe that he’s a great actor and also a bad choice for Batman. But I’ll be happy to be wrong if he ends up being good in the role. 

Oh I believe in the possibility for sure! I just don’t feel lucky enough to see the Warriors lose.

It’s obviously unlikely, but watching Kawhi take apart the Warriors and then huewhuwhwuew-ing in a post-game interview afterward would be cool as hell. This overwhelming joy will be immediately snuffed by Drake releasing a single that absolutely makes it about him and includes some dumbass line like “you always doubt…

Street Fighter Twooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooournament Edition.

I’ve only played 3, but yeah that was my experience. But I’d forget the absurd story entirely if they’d fix the driving physics. Like being pasted to the ground and driving through soup. And after gleefully grappling and soaring around it’s a total drag.

Thank you for including the bit about how and how well it plays as a single player game. It seems like every time I read a review of some new raid-ish game it doesn’t say specifically how single-player works and the definition of single-player seems to be a little loose these days. I still can’t tell if there’s an…

I’ve enjoyed most of what I’ve heard on this new one and a good deal of Emotion, but this is a fantastic review. I enjoy the hell out of pop, but I am exhausted by the poptimism of the last twenty years. Also, Call Me Maybe was Buzzfeed trying to sell two Vanessa Carltons in a trenchcoat as the summer jam and I’m…

Suddenly have the urge to listen to Andy Williams.

Imagine cheating off Skip Bayless. *leans over to pile of dry ass unseasoned chicken* What you get for number four? 

A lovely sight here in Sac is watching El Dorado Hills dumbasses try to cruise R St. in a 458 only to end up getting all red assed in a u-turn because it’s only three blocks worth of bars to peacock at. Tremendous use of artistry and engineering. 

It wasn’t as bad as the the Jail Blazers nonsense, but Sacramento treated Weber like garbage for pretty much no reason. Then decided to repeat this bullshit with Boogie.

*plays Pure Moods, vol. 1*

I can still recall being about 10 years old playing Faxanadu and repeatedly going in and out of one of the towns so I could get coins and XP from the weird puffy ghost dude at the entrance. Could never deal with grinding after that. 

There’s that line in MST3K the movie that goes “Increase the Flash Gordon noises and put more science stuff around!” Replace those with soft focus interviews and BUSINESS DESK items and you got yerself a Jeter Plan.

Dooooooug! I'm not on Twitter anymore so this is a treat. 

No Bumgarner trade. Let him dogpaddle in the toilet and make FORD TRUCK MAN commercials until he retires and a bunch of Clamper dads give him a dirt bike-shaped cake made of tactical fondant.

I can’t stop thinking about what Marchman’s take would be! Bath, but fill the tub with the showerhead? Hot shower after, but the bath has to be ice cold? Bathe in an upright shower with the door bolted shut and rinse off in the dishwasher? 

This is correct takeage and I’d like to ride its coattails and call for an end to post-credits stingers. Or, barring that, allow theater workers to pepper spray anyone trying to clog up the theater while they’re cleaning up all the spilled soda and popcorn.