What was the door wearing? And had the door been drinking too?

And don't forget the IVF bonus!

Ditto. We need other celebrity spouses in the same vein - Bellatio, Funalingus, Hummert, and the like.

Blake's the ultimate revenge shag.

Really edgy dad humor

It's obvious - one is a Scientologist and the other is not!

No broad's sky. There, fixed it for ya. You're WELCOME!

The dictionary pages always chip my nail polish. Soooo not worth it!

Like all the adults in Peanuts, except for "Penis, Penis, Peeeeeeeenis" instead of "Wah, Wah, Waaaaaaah"

Sixteen degrees of separation.

In the phrase "good pot brownies" one of those adjectives is redundant.

YES! That skipper's hat! Is this a witness re-enactment of the night in question? And do Olympic canoeists wear skipper's hats? They should at least wear skipper's hats during the sexy times!

I see it as a competitive advantage. If the flow was heavy enough, the competitors behind her could see through the scarlet waves and get lost in their lanes. Team Flo FTW!

That’s a sex party I think. Crepe paper, dedicated signage, and a cake would scoot the sex party into sexfest territory.

I was wondering why Kara was done up in blackface like that. Surely she knows better!

When two highly trained Olympic athletes go at it in close proximity to an Olympic competition, when both are in peak life-long physical condition, I daresay "fuck-fest" may be an apt descriptor, even if only two parties were involved.

A real tribute to his sex!

He's still stuck to the floor in a pool of communal menses, isn't he? Random question: is it called menses because its what the "men sees"? Discuss amongst yourselves.

Best red-hair descriptor - "titian" used in connection with Nancy Drew.

Back a couple of lifetimes ago, in my dark days of working as an engineer when Reagans roamed the Earth, the engineers had an informal system of describing unfathomably small distances. There was a scale that ran from so small it could barely be imagined to something that was still pretty damn small. The scale ran…