Not to be a pretentious PIA but that was Juliana Hatfield, not Veruca Salt. So maybe you hate Juliana Hatfield and Veruca Salt aren’t so bad?

Yeah, I’ve been thinking Craigslist might be a good way to go. And it’s good to know you’ve had luck with Feeld. I find the layout a little tricky and can’t figure out how to shorten the distance for my searches, so I get people in my Look Around who are 1000+ miles away. But they say a new version is coming out soon…

I’ve never heard someone talk about Ethical Slut or Sex at Dawn in a way that wasn’t artificial or pretentious. (I’m sure they are out there and I’m sure some of them are reading this so #notalltethicalsluts).

Ugh. The “Hey.” I hate that so, so, so much. I’ve never understood it. Why are you saying hi to me? We’ve been in the same room for at least 20 minutes.

I hope this isn’t an inappropriate question, but how do y’all find people? My dude and I want to do that, but we don’t really know where to look. I downloaded the app that used to be 3nder but it’s annoying to navigate. All the people we know who have done it bring in someone they already know, but we have no options…

This. This so much. It’s always phrased as if it’s some sort of benevolence to insist on the woman having an orgasm, because pressure to perform is such a big help. See Also: Men who tell you they’ve read She Comes First, Men who have a vibrator at their house and offer to use it on you (all I can ever think is “how…

What makes me nervous about this is that the frats and sororities aren’t an official part of the school, so this policy would effectively ban students from being a part of an outside group. What else will this extend to?

Yep. the dude I’m dating grew up poor in a tiny town and could have never gone to Harvard without their need based funding. And he was in a frat but from the way he describes it, it sounds like a combination of the island of misfit toys and the guys on Big Bang Theory.

Everyone grieves differently and I wouldn’t wish loneliness on anyone. Men do seem to move on faster than women, I think in part because there is a stigma of baggage associated with being widowed/grieving that doesn’t come with being a widower. Grieving men are seen as being sensitive and in need of nurturing, not a…

It is *so* hard to give up seeing thinness as a way to have value. And I can completely relate to the cycle of hating yourself because of your weight, then hating yourself for having that feeling. Wash, rinse, repeat. I hope you have some days (or parts of days) free from that cycle soon. And thank you for the podcast…

Oh my god. But yes, fucking of course a dude like that wants to control his partner in that way. I’ve been on a few dates like that, the last one being someone who judged me for ordering a hot chocolate for dessert (at a place that’s known for their hot chocolate!) because “it’s important to keep in shape”. He was not…

Ooooh. I can see how this might be helpful for people with anorexia/restrictive eating habits (or helping people understand what it’s like) but I don’t think I’m alone in feeling like if I watched this my brain would automatically click into anorexic competitive mode and start striving to be that thin or thinner.

Oh hi, me too, on both counts. There was an MRA website years ago that was all about why dating anorexic girls is better and all I could think was: yeah, bro, get yourself a girl with no energy, no libido, terrible breath, less hair on her head and more hair on her body who may or may not be infertile. Sexxxxy.

Why can’t she just go away already?

It’s not intended to affect the police; it’s intended to not engage in practices that harm POC/are borne out of white privilege.

Right, but she called the police herself. I don’t disagree with you, though. Calling the police when there is someone with mental illness involved, or a person of color is anywhere in the proximity, is often less safe than managing the situation yourself. Looking to the police as a source of help/safety is a luxury…

I never heard of this woman until this week, when I heard her garbage set on 2 Dope Queens. The jist of it was: white women experience pressure to be thin/pretty and it leads to low self esteem. WOC don’t have the same pressure to look a certain way *and* they have unyielding self confidence born of centuries of…

Yesterday I listened to the interview with Deray on Pod Save the People and wanted to smash my head into the steering wheel. While declaring how “woke” she is, she kept interrupting him, clearly looking for cookies for being moderately aware of privilege. When asked how she plans to keep herself accountable in regard…

So tired of the “real men” hot takes from both sides. Yes, it is gross to say that “real men” are the ones who get into fights but it is equally gross to say that men shouldn’t engage in violence because a “real” one knows not to hurt people.

Thank you for this. It is good to hear a happy story!