Would you settle for Australian comedian Yahoo Serious in a bald cap?

I’m glad Simmons is alive, which I would have sworn against before reading this.

Richard Simmons ought to play Pauly Shore in a Pauly Shore biopic.

Oh man this thread almost feels like old AV Club

I’m confident that Mr. Shore will supply the same thoughtful gravitas, subtlety, and attention to detail he puts into all of his roles.

I’ll be honest, I thought that was Lars Ulrich in the right side of the header pic.

I feel like the only thing we need less right now than a Richard Simmons biopic is a Pauly Shore comeback. 

I want to make it clear that I also do not want Pauly Shore to play me in any future biopics.

“we all need this biopic now more than ever.”

Well red hair, fire, and location of said hair.  Not defending the comment 

I didn’t even know they gave out DUI awards!

the ancestral poetry of her people

it’s a japanese maple?

Yeah I haven’t been invested in the host selection at all but if she were in the running I’d cast a vote.

Poor Lindsay & Ariana DeBose, jokes were made about them. The horror.

Of all the balls in the world, his were the most dank

Oh, were they mean, girl?

I didn’t realize there WAS a reference beyond Lohan being a redhead. And while the label is childish and silly, it’s hardly an aggressively mean insult.

Well I mean Lohan DOES have red hair and I mean if she wasn’t shaving....

She’d be delightful.  Maybe if her career starts to wane or she wants to slow down a bit.  It’s fun to dream.