Who wants to start a pool to bet on how long Burneko has had this article written up? Side bet on how he and Thompson agreed on who’d write it (my money is on a cage fight)

“This Is The Face Of A Man Getting Pulled . . .

justthetips@deadspin.com

Deadspin: guy mashes massive donger into dong space!
Also Deadspin: Please respect our time and journalistic integrity when submitting ideas to us.

You mess with this guy, he’s Gafencu up.

So, would you say this clock management was... sloppy seconds?

You’re saying he came after Pitino?  Believable. 

I am replying to myself and my own article to let the record show that I am not racist since I wear white after Labor Day.

I’m not doing the math, but I hope the answer is 80085.

If this were Cooper, the clues of “word he didn’t know” and “mom” would clearly indicate this kid used the word “love.”

“Trust me, you’re better off not knowing.”

Warriors Investigators Ask To Whom Bell Tolls

If there’s one term we can use to describe the AAF, it’s arrested development.

Oh sure. Now he’s against release.

Wrong St. Petersburg.

I do not want to see Robert Kraft given a blowjob, but I do want to live in a world where the video of Robert Kraft getting a blowjob is widely available.

Massachusetts Man attempts to purchase tape of his own handjob. 

I hope he does shut it down for the headline

Have they considered just not paying players and instead offer them experience and worthless degrees?

This shit is so good and I keep being afraid someone’s going to notice and take him away from here.