hey some people like Applebee’s

Dead? No, he’s not dead. See?

John Elway runs the Broncos the way Homer Simpson groaned at the mere prospect of owning them, when Hank Scorpio gave him the team.

Looks like the Ravens were able to make a potential quarterback controversy vanish into thin air.

Did anybody see a bucket of ice and a note that said “Tough luck, get drunk on me. Use the bucket to ice down your marbles, Yours, Trae”

LeBron logged a 28-11-16 triple-double to tie Wilt Chamberlain’s fifth all-time mark

Driven monthly.  Period.

As a business owner, I’d like to remind you that it’s not just that you make money — you have to be profitable, after all — but how you make money.

Its the one you eat with the gabbagool.

Oman, I think you missed the joke.

Financial catastrophe, yes, but ‘shitshow’ is inapt. The games went off without a hitch and were well attended. A lot of infrastructure was built which was a benefit to the people.

Oh yeah, Russia still thinks that’s an investment. That’s why when people tell me that Putin & the Gang are fourth-level geniuses, I give them extreme side-eye.

Whatever Montreal’s financial issues were, and there were plenty, they didn’t directly lead to a sharp decline in the quality of life in the city and leave unused facilities littering the city’s landscape.

But Rio was a literal shitshow. As in rowing and outdoor swimming competitors were surrounded with water filled with actual shit. 

You wanna be mad at him, and stay back, to make him earn your love and trust again, but you’re just so damned happy, and you giddily jump up and down screaming “Daddy!” Over and over again. And your dad says “Christ, son, you’re 35, stop calling me that. And put some fucking pants on. You’re why I left.”

Seriously. Was a walking in memoriam around here for weeks and all of the sudden the corpse walks in like ‘hey, what stinks in here!’

That’s how long it took to find a pack of Kent IIIs, he said

You remember that Sunday morning, two months after dad left, you wake up and notice mom’s hair is seriously mussed, and then you walk into the kitchen and dad is making eggs like the past eight weeks never happened . . .

Probably not “right” back.

DREW I HELD MY POOP IN FOR WEEKS WAITING FOR YOU TO COME BACK SO I CAN HAVE A GREAT MOMENT IN POOP HISTORY