"Oriental Beauties" is hot chicks with compasses, right? Orienteering porn?

So basically, standing in one spot and being very thin is really the only way to wear Lululemon pants?

Loki was a girl HORSE for a while. And then he had a little surprise, and named it Sleipnir...

White people are supposed to do that; it is all just part of God's plan of manifest costumery.

Having personally dealt with this idiot and being approached by him multiple times, (he used the typical "where is [random building on campus]? I thought I'd ask you since I just moved here from California and you look like a Cali girl/you have California hair." line that was used many times on many different girls as…

Sweaters. I knit sweaters for my cats.

I hope they put "sexual adventuress" on my headstone. Whether or not it turns out to be true. It sounds hilarious.

This means there's a slight chance that one of the justices will actually say the word "boobies" out loud. Not gonna hold my breath, but it could happen. I know it's juvenile of me, but regardless of the definition "boobies" is a funny word {like "shampoo" and "squiggle"} .

I think it was someone on Jez, commenting on that stupid "save the tatas" campaign, who said, "I have breast cancer. These people are trying to 'save the tatas' while mine are literally trying to kill me." That sentiment has stuck with me.

Shame and ridicule aren't affective encouragement. Effective encouragement, if you are of the opinion that Halloween is unhealthy, would be to hand out fruit, snack bags of baby carrots, etc. She doesn't want to encourage, she wants to feel superior.

Nuts, especially almonds and walnuts, are very healthy, full of calcium, fiber, protein, magnesium, vitamin E, and the list goes on. When eaten in moderation (a small handful a day) they are beneficial. Raisins are not the worst food, but are full of sugar and not nearly as good for you. Calories aren't everything.

You know what would be great? If Jezebel.com would interview her about her work. It's not as big a platform as the Today Show, but since we're all sitting here griping about how she got conned out of her chance to tell a broad audience about her nonprofit...

I've started calling it "freeze peach" when people misinterpret it like that.

Racism against Roma people, unlike racism against any other kind of people, is totally legitimate. I know this because some Roma people treated me badly in the past. Roma people are the ONLY people that have ever treated me badly. No other group has criminals in it, especially white Europeans. This is likely due to…

//suddenly makes vomit-inducing connection between endowment fundraising and fresh meat for horny alums

So I like a little sexytalk during sexytimes. But I don't think anything would dry my vagina up faster than hearing "that thing is swollen" followed by a reference to lunch baggies.

Unfortunately for Babcock, he was later detained and interrogated by Homeland Security after hearing he'd been running with some rough-looking afghans.

Every time some dumbfuck whiteboy says some dumbfuck whiteboy shit every other dumbfuck whiteboy calls it satire like a big dumbfuck.

I'm assuming it was Zeus.

OK, even if you do think this is a joke, that is not something you send in an email.”