I would love to see Kim Davis forced to issue a marriage license to Chris Brown and Damon Wayans. Trump and Huckabee giving away the grooms. Bill Cosby officiating. Sarah Palin giving a toast in ‘merican. Then I want to see the whole lot of them choke to death on the plastic from a Kraft’s singles. Or better yet,…

You should hear about the time we had to park next the pavement so that he could get his torch out of the boot!

14 YOs who have to support themselves tend to wise up very early.

Oh, Poolesville; the place that makes Rockville residents feel good about where they live...

You get paid $1 to my 77¢ you’re footing the bill, buddy.

Denmark is all What did we do? Leave us out of your fuckery.

I’m so sorry. I just want to show solidarity as a person who has had the same fear everytime my phone makes a noise. I hope you and the rest of your family are getting the support you need. My hair started falling out at the worst of it, it is a horrible experience, but you can't force anyone to get help or stay…

I understand exactly where these parents are coming from. Our daughter had everything going for her when she graduated high school. She went to college, got addicted, and has lost everything as a result. She’s ruined her health, her mind, her relationships, and her future. She stole from everyone, got arrested, has…

Look on the bright side: you’re toilet trained!

Donald Trump Merkins.

This is why you do extensive research on who is going to tattoo you. Get to know the artist.

Look, let’s face it. Men are far too emotional to be trusted with the power of governing things.

I think the point of the “beloved husband” line is to say that men who pay for sex are, for the most part, just average joes seeking something they can’t otherwise find in their lives. In other words, some normal guy we may know personally rather than some isolated deviants operating outside the bounds of “normal…

I have sex worker friends. I’m amazed at how often an acquiescence will throw what my friends do or have done into conversations for shock value, completely at the determent of my friends. “Didn’t you know Jane did porn” they will say so that the rest of the group looks at Jane like a zoo animal. It’s meant to…

YAAASSS!!! You’ll have to pry my Hitachi away from my cold, dead clitoris.

Hate to say, but I’ve never found the Rabbit any good. The rubber rabbit-ears break off easily and are too gentle for me. The original “orgasm generator” if you ask me is the Magic Wand.

My pappy was buried in a nice flannel shirt and suspenders.

When my son passed away, he was 14 months old and a friend had brought his young daughter up from KY for the funeral. It was late January and she had never seen snow so she started doing snow angels and playing in the snow at the cemetery. The other kids who were there were looking at their parents for the same…

Looks like the other women on board were traveling on the White Whine train.

Sadly, I’m from there. So I can confirm that this is correct.