You have a point, but you still shouldn’t refer to his wives as “twinkies.”

True - but he interviewed himself exhaustively to get all the details straight.

Pamela Anderson has a corrosive effect on men’s souls.

You had me at Benghazi. *swoon*

When you say “boxer-clad erection” I assume the boxer in question is Floyd Mayweather, Jr.

“What’s a man doing with a bobby pin?”

On the one hand they seem like dopes with dope doing dopey things who deserve to be shipped off to jail or New Zealand.

I hope Sgt. Balunas didn’t accidentally discharge his weapon inside his pants.

Even more awkward than the hug or the not-hug are two subspecies of guy-on-guy halfhugs: the side-by-side hug dads employ with grown sons, and the hug-accompanied-by-vigorous-pounding-on-the-back employed by grown men who are clearly terrified of an actual hug.

Sex with the Queen ought to count for something.

Also, according to her only non-Americans are rapists.

When I think of Clinton vs Trumpf, “sexy” isn’t exactly the word that comes to mind.

Seems like a good time for Mexico to start building a wall of their own.

If Ben Roethlisberger is right (about this or any other issue) I would infinitely prefer to be wrong.

And yet... he’s still 8 quillion times more credible than Donald Trump’s “doctor”!

Speaking of sucking farts out of asses...

I like to disguise myself as a toilet and let women shit all over me. I deserve it. *whimper*

Mmmm... Weird immigration waffles... with Canadian maple syrup!

Many of their computers are antiquated and only moved out there for the weather.

Quayle vs. Murphy Brown.