If she tried to talk him out of it, then she had an idea what he was planning was wrong.

If only an enraged gun-toting terrorist would kill this guy.

I always said he was crotchety.

Sex with my sexy wife would be fun on father’s day, but what I’m really fantasizing about is some quality nap time on the sofa.

What they do is you go down there, Ok? You spend hella big bucks on food and hookers and shit and then when you’re leaving to go home they stuff 800,000 Zika mosquitoes in a tube and pop it up your butt.

You mean those wacky mosaics? I like them too. There's a documentary about the dude who makes them.

Every dad ever... literally.

Dumb rocky statue. Every goddamn person.

I wouldn't fuck that asshole for all the billions of dollars he claims to have.

Yes. It's a shooting guard.

Amber Heard needs someone around who can empathize with her and care for her and cry with her and comfort her and kiss her tears away. I believe that person is me. It is the least I can do for my country.

How this happened? Easy. He murdered a thousand Palestinians and took their hair.

God help us... the “America, I am a victim” tour.

I call bullshit. Fruity Mix, Sensation, and Dual Extase are flavors of chewing gum. At least I thought they were. Come to think of it, they all taste like latex and spermicide. The bubbles last a good long time though!

It will be interesting to see what becomes of this dude once he gets out of jail, now that he's the poster child for entitled rapists.

I was with you until you used the term “unpack.” After that you became the guy at the cocktail party who talks loudly about how much he pays to get his ass waxed.

Terrorism sprouts in Brussels, blooms in Orlando.

Useless shitbags one and all. Also most of them have seriously scary faces.

I was thinking of people who doff their caps and say “top of the morning!” but same idea I guess.

A lot of the greatest players were/are dicks. Rose. Bonds. Cobb. Reggie. Schilling. Who gives a shit? It doesn’t make them any less great.