It's not a wide-ranging area of light. The building is refracting light into one small point of laser heat, kind of like how a big magnifying glass only makes one tiny pinpoint of ant-burning goodness. This car was in the wrong spot, but the stuff around it could easily escape harm.

p.s. My mom helped me write this.

Just be consistent. And listen to the noises. You'll be fine, kiddo.

I would imagine they stimulate the ovaries and generally make a lady feel all tingly all over. Don't be intimidated. They're just love octopi.

Being a sewage worker in London is one of the most dangerous jobs in the world. Fatbergs, hepatitis, and a thousand other horrors, all in the dark. You're also perpetually just one foot-slip away from an unimaginably horrifying death, wherein you drown alone in a bottomless pond of poop while your colleagues can only…

Nope. The one time I flew Qantas from Los Angeles to Sydney, it took fourteen hours. That alone was enough to turn me into Jack Nicholson's character from The Shining, and I was flying Business Class. Add poop and shove me in a Coach seat, and I'd have ejected those teenagers the way Ripley ejected the Alien from the…

I would seek therapy for this. I'm not kidding or snarking you. I totally understand wanting to eat alone sometimes, especially at work or school. (In fact, I would probably use one of these cubicles if I could most days!) But eating is THE social habit of our species. It keeps us alive—both socially and…

I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE. Holy crap, I'm so glad to know it's not just me.

I'm a lady person, and I believe hands and forearms are the sexiest part of a man's body.

I'm happily married, and I have a great relationship track record. Just popped in on one of your old comments because I'm baking a pie for my amazing husband, and I'm waiting for it to come out of the oven.

"a Bourgeoisie"? With a capital B?

Shouldn't you be packing my groceries right now, Mr. Wizard?

OK, I hate rich people, and I don't usually cry about massively expensive crap getting lost. But this is actually kind of a shame. That boat was seriously cool, and it sounds like the rescue was badly handled.

How exactly is electing a gay Satan worshiper who equips our army with high heels and pink uniforms a bad thing?

I tittered.

Well, at least we know she's keeping things tidy up in there.

Meanwhile, at Cracker Barrel...

I spent part of my childhood in Germany and France, and I obsessed over my collection of old-school Smurf books and recordings from the 60s and early 70s.

I worked with a graduate student last year who did a small study of pregnant mothers. She was terrified, because her results included an undeniable anomaly... the mothers who smoked had really, REALLY healthy babies.