Ashley Shittinberg.

this gave me a solid chuckle, thank you.

well that was a welcomed and unexpected laugh for me. I’m going to use this in the future, it’ll be in my back pocket until then.

jesus christ, did NONE of them watch The West Wing? I’m Canadian and I knew that.

Useful Jew sounds like the best name for a memoir, I dont know why...

They literally just told you.

It’s okay to put off coming out. I know it’s painful when something you’ve been working towards is put on the back burner, but if you feel unsafe I hope and pray you find the right time and place to do it, even if its 4 years from now. You are still you at your core, small words to take comfort in but it’s all I can…

omg your adorable peanut just made me feel 110% better about everything today.

good think Assualt weapons are legal then

you lack the ability to read sarcasm, that’s what’s wrong.

of course y’all are, ya lesbian shitasses.

Good luck tonight, my yankee friends. You are all welcome to come enjoy my warm Canadian homestead after tonight. Poutine makes everything better.

*takes soggy, smelly envelope out of mailbox* Honey, your ceviche is here!

If I don’t pee after sex, I will 99% have a UTI by the next day. I’ve done experiments with it and will never go back.

Also, I found using pads gave me more yeast infections and UTIs, but never realized it until I started using a Diva cup.

Breathe in and tell me.

I’m so glad I’m not the only one who read that and sang out loud “I’m a firestarter, SCENTED FIRE STARTER” eeeooowwnnnnn

I have a slinky sexy one I wear in the morning to make coffee when the man-friend is over. I also have a fluffy purple monstrosity that I wear when I get out of the shower but don’t feel like dressing right away. Or when I’m sick and cold and just want to be hugged by Grimace.

I feel bad for judging books by their covers, but have you ever read about someone committing a shitty crime or doing something stupidly racist, then looked at the mugshot and said “of COURSE you did...”

All of the stories this year scared me or made me laugh nervously after reading...but yours was the first to send goosebumps down the entire length of my body for a solid five minutes afterwards.