One of them calls him “poppy,” which makes me want to fucking kill something.

Kudos for including “Dick Pound’s baileywick” in this piece.

This is a great piece, and I agree with most of it...

...but you’re dead fucking wrong about the police. I would venture that you’ve never listened to anything but the shite we’ve all heard, but their first three records are pretty unimpeachable.

Hey! Actual good, useful advice!
Get the fuck out of here.

Beautiful, and accurate.

Yeah, no. Go fuck yourself.

Unusually warm grape kool-aid.

That logo is fucking hilarious, it looks like a 12 DPI scan of a cut-rate Gold’s Gym brochure.

Fading Uncle Rico all day.

That was the last album I bought as well, and aside from “Wasted Years,” it sucked (to me, at least).

It was them, not you.

I saw the Live After Death, Powerslave and Somewhere in Time tours before this last one. Those were all great.

This is accurate.

Because I am an idiot who has seen Maiden in their heyday, I went and saw them last year, and it was FUCKING HORRIBLE.

There was some “stunt” third guitarist, a 50 yo in spandex who was a real showboat, and between him and the horrible sound it was terrible.

Huh?

Re: napping, when I was a younger, more idiotic idiot, I had a temp job doing filing for a law firm. For some insane reason, I had a big office in an out of the way part of the firm - a really ridiculous office, the kind lined with books on every wall - with no windows.

No one ever, ever came to see me or ask for…

“Even if you do win, it won’t make you happy”

None of it was truly outrageous until you get to the $30 sixer of Bud Light.

FUCK. YOU.

Jesus hates Dabo Swinney.

I have no dog in this hunt, but I’d like to say...

...fuck “Dabo” Swinney with this and every on-side kick.

“He will be terribly missed, despite the fact that he was never really here to begin with.”

Fantastic.

I’m trying to think of a way to tell my very little story without sounding like I’m piling on (which I’m not, at all)...

I’ve been mugged at gun point three times. One of those times I was with my little sister, who was a teen at the time. I slowly stepped in front of my sister (one small side-step) and told the mugger…