Also, I heard that usual tipping etiquette requires that you calculate the tip based on the UNDISCOUNTED fee while using a coupon, which means that server missed out on a significant part of the day's income.

Yeah, how much were they paid for being on the show? Especially with a child in the ICU, the money would be important.

I think anyone whose brain has not finished developing can be considered a kid. By some measures I think that's in the 30s!

I'm 30 and my 24-year-old friend seems pretty young to me. : P

More importantly: Jamie Lynn's child is SIX? How old am I now???

I definitely don't understand what you think I don't understand.

They're very nice boxer-briefs, though. If you scroll past the wearer's head, you can imagine them on someone you like better.

Wait, Indians are cool with white people wearing saris? Because saris are hands-down the most elegant garments in the world and I've always wished I could wear them.

I think that child was born to be on Ellen.

Yeah, it could be taken either way, but I think putting "Caucasian" in a list of positives with "attractive" and "clean" also has unfortunate implications.

It's sort of implied by the sequence of statements: "And I'm not a creep, by the way. Attractive, clean, CAUCASIAN." As if those three things together make it clear that he's "not a creep."

You could also reenact Dante's Inferno in an Ikea.

Cue possible howls of embarrassment from Malia and Sasha.

Yeah, making silly small talk at family functions is good practice for making silly small talk later on. Unless you want to avoid socialization completely (not a good strategy for success in most cases), the best thing to do is to start with the silly questions and branch off quickly. "How old are you again?" "I'm…

Actually, mine never really ask questions like that, at least not to me. Instead, we find out answers through casual conversation and then gossip heavily behind each other's backs so that everyone has all the details.

I'm pretty sure she's the Prime Minister's sister! I always liked that she and Liam Neeson were just platonic friends.

I really liked it the first time I watched it (with friends/booze in college), liked it a bit less the second time, thought it was kind of dumb the third time, and will probably not watch it again.

I was wondering if that was what inspired this piece. Definitely the best arc from that movie. : )

Not foolproof. Black kids have been shot inside their houses, too.

Spanking? Seriously?