Best Clickventure is either Which One of My Garbage Sons Are You? or You’re The World’s Most Successful Pickup Artist. Can You Have Sex With The President Of The United States? Genius.

At least The Stache isn’t a frothing Tea Party nutcase. Just your standard sour-faced Ag-hag butthole.

Don’t! I am uncomfortable about how much I like that jacket and am struggling with the fact that Ted looks better in that than a giant trench. What I’m saying is, it’s a good jacket if it makes him look even okay.

Right? Ellie claims it’s baby food for adult women, but here’s the thing: I WOULD BUY THE FUCK OUT OF THAT. If my entire caloric intake could be pureed and eaten with a spoon, I would be in heaven. A lot of food textures really skeeve me out and trigger my gag reflex, so yogurt is my BFF.

I would try reddit. /r/babybumps is allegedly pretty sane and supportive.

I wish I could move there, period. But I’m already married and work in a not-in-short-supply profession. :(

One of mine is Dave Franco, and one of his is Allison Brie, so fourway!

More like Beelzeboob, amirite?

True story. I follow literally dozens of basset hounds.

I can smell my boss’s old lady perfume (AKA THE WORST) from down the hall. It lingers for a couple minutes if she stops by my desk too. Save me!

How about A-law-ska?

Do you know how copyright works? They can’t post any pic they want. They have to get royalty free images from places like Getty.

Right? If you want to seem innocuous, don’t name yourself after an SS doctor.

That is a majestic PAC logo.

She should also ban round back chairs in restaurants. Where the fuck am I supposed to hang my purse?

Snickerdoodles for liiiife! Seriously though, this is the best cookie recipe ever.

I know, right? I had (and have) unusual taste, and I do love a good bow tie.

I’m hoping Kerry Washington’s Confirmation makes him squirm. Asshole.

Which is crazy because his Catholicism was like a BIG DEAL as if he would be taking orders from the Pope or something.

He looks like an Adam Sandler character.