The methodology in this article is DEEPLY flawed.

That state has ... no water

I asked him today if he was a Beatles fan, and he replied that he heard they were good and intended to give them a listen in the future, adding that he really liked their song “Hotel California.”

Wow, I’ll regularly kill a 6 of something “crafty” and get that nice drunk going on. Have I been doing it wrong the whole time?

Or do I just need AA?

Or, you know, deciding 33 years on the job was enough to decide things had run their course.

You’re right...Super Dave Osborne is a legend.

The best Dave in this clip is not Letterman.

All three of their regularly-produced beers are really good. And I really dig the uniform can design.

Rat snakes are cool. I caught a 4-foot one while mowing, and it turned around and bit my hand when I picked him up. Then he tried to constrict me like I was some vole or something. “HA,” I laughed. “You can’t defeat me, silly snake.” So we released him at the park to bite children.

Do you guys have some focus group results that suggests people outside your office care as much about Bill Simmons as you all apparently do?

You’re right, of course. I know that there are some perfectly normal Skins fans, I just couldn’t let that low-hanging fruit hang there...

Look, I’m a Redskins fan. I want the damn name changed, but that motherfucker Snyder is a stubborn little bastard. Don’t malign all of us for his idiocy (and George Marshall’s definite racism). Just blame most of us.

Dan Snyder, delenda est.

50,000 racists show up to FedEx Field in Landover, MD 8 games a year.

Well he would be just fine with his GEICO uninsured motorist coverage

He’s just used to having extra O’s at the end of things where they shouldn’t belong.

I didn’t know this was a thing until i worked at a daycare and a 3 year old Jonathan Lipnicki-ish boy would tell me every time we’d go outside that, ‘The sun makes me sneeze!’ and every time he would.

Oh my god, I no longer feel so alone! I’ve only known one person, a friend in high school that was a “sun-sneezer” like me, and I remember we tried to explain it to our friends, and we got nothing—not even a mild attempt at understanding. I gave up after that. That was twenty years ago. A new day has dawned!