This whole lip thing is giving me a nasty combo of heebie-jeebies and sads. SO MUCH SADS, PLEASE STOP.

Seriously, nothing says “I’m a pinko-Islamo-fascist-anti-American-motherfucker-hell-bent-on-giving-your-hard-earned-money-to-illegal-immigrant-drug-dealing-takers-in-the-form-of-handout-entitlements-for-nothing” than not eating bread.

Wait wait wait, PALEO diet?

I will never have a good relationship with my in-laws for this very reason. I lost 80 pounds before meeting Mr. Devi and when I met his family they bond over fried and smothered foods. My mother-in-law, the first night I met her, held a spoonful of some ranch-cheese-caloric nightmare to my face and said “just try it!”…

HAHAHA, Remember that commercial “I just can’t win!”

I am not surprised that a box full of cardboard and asbestos is the National Meal of Canada.

Sadly, no.

My office makes me feel like I can’t do anything right either. Now that you have explained it, I chuckled, I probably should have seen the connection to begin with, but the constant burping I am surrounded by has dulled my mental capacities.

I don’t know what this means. But I will recommend it anyway.

I have a toddler, and someone bought us a box of the “organic” equivalent. I was unimpressed and did not eat any.

Maybe it’s just me, but I find anyone who is a self-proclaimed “babe” is probably full of shit.

It’s called being a toddler. That’s why he likes cheese. He eats yogurt and beans. You can have an affinity for a food, or a favorite food, without having a nutritional deficiency.

Erin, I think it’s in really poor taste to speak ill of the dead in this way.

For me it was a surprise! I’d never wear leather pants!

That sounds AMAZING. Also, another band name idea I always had was “Peter Francis Geraci” if you are from the Chicagoland area, maybe you’ve met my monotone pal Pete:

He’s right.

I HAD NO IDEA I WAS SANDY’S LOST SENSE OF SELF. TODAY IN THE OFFICE HAS NOW BEEN SLIGHTLY LESS SOUL CRUSHING THAN NORMAL. THANK YOU MADELEINE DAVIES.

She drinks black coffee just like me!!!!!!!!!! I AM PATTI SMITH!!!!!!!!!

GOOD DENTAL HYGIENE IS HIS BY RIGHTS, KATIE DRIES.

Obviously, global warming is just a sham to sell more bike shorts!!!!