Yeah, heaven forfend that Ubi would dare implement a photo mode.

8 hours worth of speech about DACA, no, anything really, sounds like having ambien funneled down my gullet.

I’m willing to concede to the possibility of this being evidence of strigoi occupying the White House, which is probably why he only eats with plastic forks.

Considering that she was being fed information since childhood by her focus, it would make sense that she’d be more advanced than a lot of the others. She’s seen more in her life so far than most of even the eldest of her tribe saw in theirs.

President of Blizzard: Gentlemen, we are dealing with someone here who....has absolutely no life.

Maybe when medical science is advanced enough, we’ll have implants with a Ctrl+Z function. Only potential downside is the possibility of accidentally reversing something else.

Jesus was the product, not the manufacturer. That’s like asking a Nissan Altima to put its tires back on!

That blue tie is atrocious. 0/10 would not vote for again.

So the medical condition affects prison time, but clearly not the assailant’s ability to threaten or molest people when loose in society. Seems legit.

If by shit you mean the legally blind rapist, then have at it.

To answer one of these questions, “too drunk on a Tuesday” depends on whether or not you can take a sick day the following day, in which case, there is no such thing.

I mean, even if the peeps at the Golden Globes didn’t bother to go Full Funeral, they wouldn’t have beaten this retinal orgy.

For fuck’s sake, Potato Shrek’s stories keep getting worse

This reminds me of the last time I was at Costco, and a bunch of folks were actually bickering over who was next to get their free sample. Like, goddamn, the girl in the apron is constantly frying up new batches of fish bits you greedy fucks.

But then that makes him related to Ziggy, who evolved from the blobfish.

I can’t help but entertain the possibility that this was all a ruse by the shark charities to get more money, and I ain’t even mad, because they need more money. Give to sharks!

But for the love of Jeff, please be pure, Tom Hanks.

If she does I’d like to be paid in exactly the MSRP of a mid-range iMac Pro. I’d say it’s a reasonable price.

Hey well I can’t really argue with that, especially since not using paper ends up working out better.

That may depend on the formulation of the liquid and the temperature the vaporizer heats it. A “cold” vape that doesn’t have propylene glycol shouldn’t cause that kind of discomfort, unless there’s something else that you’re reacting to.