A star and several quiet snickers f0r “jilled off”...

You know, I’m better friends with both of my ex wives than I ever was with either of my wives. Jussayin, I think sometimes being ex actually helps.

You know, I would pay more money to see Thomas the bloody Tank Engine screaming “mea culpa!!!” at throngs of angry parents than I’d ever pay for a Brazzers membership.

LOL... no... no, I mean in the past. I've BEEN engaged. And engaged. And married. And divorced. And engaged. And married. And divorced.

Oh Jesus. I just realized that I've been that guy like... shit... more than a couple times. *sigh* Time to go get drunk so I can have an excuse for the apologetic texts to old girlfriends tonight...

YES!

I feel pretty sure that's one of the girl's phones... maybe he went through the lot and took selfies on their phonesies.

All the stars for this comment. All of them.

Ha, that's certainly a fair request... it's difficult though, when one is in that state of mind, to fully control the snippiness/tones/whathaveyou in our various responses. To be fair, I've certainly had women do the exact same thing to me ;)

I'm not easily annoyed, personally, but I know that when I am, I don't like to talk about it until after I'm over it, because I know that clear communication about the issue is going to be difficult if not impossible while I'm in that state... Is possible he's exhibiting some variation of this?

HA! I kind of like your solution better, but yes, I think mine has just a touch more elegance :-P

Holy gods, I would ditch so many friends for these...

Personally, I suggest you do what I do to combat such people: get speakers bigger than his. Two 15" subwoofers on your home system will teach him a lesson :-)

Hell, I just sighed in envy, and I'm neither gothy nor a teenager.

Holy shit I want your place. That sounds like my kind of heaven. Uh, except the turkeys. Fuck a bunch of turkeys.

Dammit, Mark... I mean, this is cute as hell, but not nearly as badass as I was led to believe. Here I was anticipating some hardcore motherfucking ninja pussy and all I get is cute fuzzy pussy that's arguably a little feisty at best.

...also, I hereby publicly make no apologies whatsoever for my excessive ellipses...

Exactly. The hell with Amazon and monster porn... let's talk about how 4chan secretly set the downfall of civilization into motion in the mid-2ks.

Huh... according to Google, this is the earliest known appearance of the Rules of the Internet.

AH yes, Rule 34...