more like "I don't give a fuuuuck"

Man, these guys will say ANYTHING to avoid playing for Coach Tomsula.

Translation I ain't risking my neck for a team so far up its own ass I'm shocked it hasn't gotten a concussion headbutting its rib cage.

This surprises me. I thought you had to have head trauma to want to play for San Francisco this year.

What the FUCK.

This lawyer's a real winner

If you want Winston to come, I think you're supposed ask him not to come.

Winston's lawyer explains:

Chip Kelly: Let's all welcome Frank Gore to the Philadelphia Eagles.

Eagles, 2013-14: Look at our roster! We've got LeSean McCoy, DeSean Jackson, our nobody Napoleon Dynamite look-alike quarterback had a historically great season, and it's all because of our widely touted head coach's system, which fits perfectly with our roster!

The Eagles and SF seem to have lost their minds this offseason.

How I imagine this happened:

I can't help but imagine that Jeff Lurie must be holed up somewhere in a Center City penthouse suite since last Wednesday, with the windows painted black and surrounded by jars of his own urine.

At this point, I fully expect Chip Kelly to hit Vince Papale with a steel chair and take off his windbreaker to reveal a Cowboys shirt underneath.

Stephen A. Smith is going to blow a gasket when learns Chip is bringing in Oklahoma players now.

I also had similar issues with will.I.am and Flo Rida

Fun fact, it took me something like 17 years to realize that High Morris = humorous

I'm sorry that a harmless website's got you feeling some kinda way, fam.

Looking things up might do you good. "Jamoke" is decades old. It's been in use since at least the 40's to mean sucker/loser/chump/idiot.