Have you listened to his radio counterpart?

When you say “clinical finisher”, do you mean that his finishing usually puts him in a clinic? Because that clip ...

That curveball was hung-as-hell, of course it produced a huge dong

Chris Wondolowski Is A Crime Against Soccer

They’re not talking about his penis?

Oh, did you get lost? This is Deadspin, hon.

“Friends of Jason” sounds like the shittiest support group in the world

At last, an owner predisposed to accept 4th or 5th place.

My favorite is them saying that it is less messy to use a machine. Because when I typically pour myself a glass of juice, the liquid gets everywhere. The counter top. My shirt. My fucking eyes.

If only Doug had the pitchman power of Troy McClure.

I’m just so tired. These awful people keep having zero consequences. If he ran again today- he’d probably re elected. Everything is the worst

“I am not a racist.”™

Belichick always liked to use two tight ends too

He died doing what he loved...

Wow, this guy just can’t stop killing people. 

It seems like the best stroke of this match did not come from the court.

Congrats on the sex

Couldn’t any gangbanger make the same claim? “The murderous, terrifying persona I use on the streets is all an act, it couldn’t be further from my true nature or my personality. I am a loving teddybear on my own time, but my day job representing MS-13 is performance art, and ‘Trigger Mike’ is just a character I play.”