Ugh, what the fuck?! This is fucked up, but what’s more fucked up is that I immediately thought “at least it wasn’t in her face.” Because a girl riding the train in Chicago got slapped in the face with a sock full of human shit by some asshole dude who then jumped off the train and ran.

I used to frequently take an Amtrak trip to downstate Illinois from Chicago, about a 6-hour ride. I felt like I was CONSTANTLY getting up and asking an Amtrak employee to intervene on this kind of shit. Creepy loner men would get on, sit next to or near a young girl or woman, and proceed to drink themselves into…

Can we make sure this happens next? What do I need to sign to put my tax dollars toward this?

I was just thinking that... “Burton will tell us about his most recent lapse, and the lapse he has planned for August, which will take him to Rio de Janeiro.”

Amazing. FINALLY.

I have a real problem with small children being filmed as they navigate difficult emotional terrain, e.g. their father going to prison after a year without their mother. This is real shit for them, it shouldn’t be entertainment for others. It is just too icky for me to deal with.

I know! The tattoos confused me. I guess the son of God has snake tats?

Vanilla Gunsmoke

I thought it was 90s Billy Ray Cyrus.

Now we know why it takes more and more junk to get high every time. Dammit!

“There’s a lot of negative stuff on Facebook and so I thought this would be positive,” he explains.

I am a huge Potterhead but I just don’t get the Potter-themed wedding. It all seems so corny and overdone. When you walk into a wedding and every. single. tiny. thing. is ON THEME, it’s more like a game of I-Spy than anything else. OH honey the forks have handles made of recycled Snitches!

My mother had 3 of us at home, in bed, in under 10 hours, unassisted (except for my dad, a copy of Spiritual Midwifery, and once, a phone call to Ina May Gaskin). With the fourth, she knew something was “different” and got to the hospital in time for them to get my little sister out and cut the cord from around her…

I think all of this, every single bit of what they do or don’t do, is part of the Publicity Machine they’ve built. Beyonce’s life has been dedicated to the pursuit of fame, and she is really fucking good at it. All of this: the cheating rumors, an album of songs about marital strife, Jay-Z’s appearances with her, and…

It’s actually for dogs 55-65 pounds, and he’s usually between 53 and 55 pounds. We didn’t pull it snug around him and he still acted like he was being punished. I think perhaps it’s just not the answer for poor Fuzzbutt Jenkins. (not his name) (kind of wish it was)

In truth: he may in fact be a catdog. Or at least part cat. He has many cat traits.

See, can someone tell me if I’m doing it wrong? My dog has terrible separation anxiety and recently had a mild seizure so we were told to get one of these. It only seems to upset him more, he stands in the middle of the room and refuses to move, only stares at us with giant, frightened eyes. Then the sad crying starts.

This THE major issue my husband and I have. It is the major-est. It makes me want to wad him up and throw him in the trash. He hates the top sheet and smashes it down to the bottom, then kicks it over to my side, and I have to fix it every night before getting into bed again or I wake up at 3am in a sheet pocket,…

I can’t help but wonder how many of the ladies in all black were inspired by Cenobites.

Oh good fucking luck dealing with the HR department of a major retail company. I worked retail for years and saw and heard some fucked up shit, and the worst thing you could possibly do was go to HR. Not only would they refuse to act, but your name would go onto some kind of list and suddenly you were getting written…