When you put it that way, it really is a pretty simple equation and Symone Sanders should also be mentioned as a potential running mate.

At this point, all that’s saving me is there’s no backyard to bury me in.

$pot on, man.

One of the candidates we rejected in favor of John Kerry was Biden. The “we can do war better” tack failed miserably and here we are with the second stringer trying to outblack Hitler. It's not too hard to see the way this thing is gonna play out.

Goldie should take solace in the fact that she will always be a better quarterback than Smokin' Jay Cutler.

The planter class will probably take exception to your description of their $20 million investment as an expense.

I need someone - anyone, to tell me why these cops are so afraid of this kid?

So all this time we thought Corn Pop was a Yoda-like muse and it was really just Kobe Bryant.

If you read further , he plays yakety sax for an encore.

Every day, these murderers’ premeditation becomes clearer and clearer.

Username: heshethey

The thing is, I CAN totally read that motherfucker’s mind and it just started a couple of weeks ago. Mostly old porn movies and Big Macs so far. It’s kind of a weak signal, but I know it’s him because all the “boning Ivanka” stuff.

When your go-to, “He can’t be racist,” black friend is Michael Jackson, you're pretty much as woke as it gets.

Hit him with a shovel, so he doesn't suffer.

My Auntie bakes a really mean murder hornet pie, with Lindsay Graham cracker crust.

The irony of a money losing clothing line dedicated to DJ will be stint enough, thanks.

I thought Ranch was against the law?

It’s almost as if his neck has been perfectly bred to fit a guillotine.

Really dodged a bullet there. Yesterday we almost made Rudy 2.0 the president .

You had me at "one day he will be dead."