Are you a single person, or do you live with a partner? I couldn’t imagine having intimate moments if both my spouse and I didn’t shower daily. Even on the occasions where we decide to be intimate in the morning when it has been ~24 hours since we bathed I notice things aren’t exactly as fresh and pleasant as they…

I don’t think anyone is upset with Elon for hosting SNL. They are upset with SNL for having him host.

Each one of them I hope.

Dodging the action like it was income taxes

Yup.

His colleague definitely did not seem as prepared for shit to go down. Had to be told to get the rifle out and did not seem super comfortable with it in his hands. Hope he gets to stay that way. 

That’s why we call her Miss Jackson.

I hear he prefers Twinkies.

I mean, we know why he was really buying all those Twinkies in Die Hard...

Yeah, she said “I hope a bunch of assholes on the internet don’t whataboutism their way out of the real conversation, but I’m sure they will.” 

Why are there not more stars for you?

I’ve often said that the printing of money should be privatized.

They probably didn’t care if any of said kids froze in that crazy cold they had a few months back. 

It’s Texas. I’m guessing they give the newborn a free gun and MAAAYYYBE let Mom have a few days off work if she belongs to the right church.

Right?

I HAVE NEVER WANTED ANYTHING MORE THAN THIS

This is my entire ass dream. Please drag down everyone else you’re connected with Gaetz.

The way I “sniggled” at that...

At Hartfield-Jackson International, most of the people working everything from TSA to the newspaper/convenience stands on the terminal are POC, which just highlights the lunacy of these cops thinking harassing a passenger is a good look.

No lies detected.