When I was a kid, my dad used to make me go outside and rub two sticks together so we could have wifi.

“A lot of guys here are divorced. A lot of guys on the other team are divorced, we are playing divorced guys here boys.”

Appropriate goalie GIF.

Goalies are most definitely an odd breed. I went to school at a perennial D3 contender. My senior year there was a persistent streaker who’d run through dorms and bang on doors and just flash people and bolt. Did this for months. When he got caught, it was not surprising to find out he was the starting goalie for the…

The plotting itself in Act 2 was pointless. What Rian Johnson was trying to do (I’m not sure I totally agree with his decisions) was take the usual harebrained Star Wars convoluted Hail Mary hero plan and make it fail. And fail spectacularly.

Every election from now on is going to require a Trump.

The staccato in her speech made each of those claps exist and not exist at the same time. Sharon Reed just invented Schrodinger’s Clapback and should be up for the Nobel Prize in Physics for that shit.

Octonauts is the shit tho

Did you read the part where it said the AV was boxed in and had no where to go?

Here’s the full interview with Jerad, courtesy of interviewer Jen, if y’all would like to see the whole thing.

Choke the Raven nevermore.

There’s a reasonable explanation for all of this (you’ll kick yourself for not thinking about it). The mob is influencing these games. See everybody is betting on the Golden Knights to lose, so what they’re doing is paying the players under the table to win and then betting against the crowd. The perfect crime.

George W. Bush orchestrated a worldwide torture regime.

Holy Christ. I think the earth just switched polarity on me. Now I’m wondering what else might work. I’m thinking junior mints. Time to visit my shaman.

Thanks to a panel-wide misunderstanding of Asian geography and some nimble betting work, he won.

After the look of last night’s game, it’s more likely that Crystal Palace will end up scoring 246 goals in the Premier League than the Calgary Flames scoring 1 in the NHL.

We found love in a ropeless place.

I’m a woman aged 36....I had two beers on Sunday, did not get a buzz. The next day I was nauseous all day, went into a two day panic and took a pregnancy test this morning. Its just now occurring to me that I might have had a hangover off of those two beers.

The impetus for me was the onset of the 24-36 hour hangover. It was then that I surrendered