I thought this was an oddly specific joke until I googled it.

I hate Aubrey

is this photoshopped?

counterpoint: backpacks are for children

fornication is a cardinal sin

that’s a legal hike?

this is the first time i’ve seen someone in a backwards hat in years.

Dumping a giant bucket of mayonnaise would improve something. so i don’t think the metaphor works.

Worth noting that he is making more money in MLS than anyone is making in Serie A. Not to mention this past weekend he got his first Azzurri call up in a year due to these results.

good work guys, halfway there.

Puff is a garbage coattail riding herb. don’t do this, Shea.

the fact that your dog has a xanax prescription informs the rest of this post.

“If they can use Excel and fog a mirror,”

related: in Italian a Frascatore is “someone who goes off on tangents while talking”

there’s internet in Idaho?

doesn’t look that bad

Went to a predominantly white Assemblies of God church growing up. Everything was the same except Tasha was named Jessica and she smelled faintly of cranberry vodka and clove cigarettes.

If and when humans ever colonize a new planet, how racist (or planetist?) will the people of Earth be to those people born on this new planet? Also, will the humans on Mars turn out like the American Colonists, revolting against tyrannical Earthlings, and eventually declaring their freedom and disassociating from the…

Listen guys, it’s not like we’re asking you to BE smart and tough. Just SOUND smart and tough.

But Coach, Ryan is an idiot!