D.B. Pooper

That was how things started out with Nixon, too. The Republicans tried to stand by him for awhile, but as the evidence became more damning, they started abandoning their support (to save their own hides).

Credentialed! Well, that clears Deadspin.

I think you might need Tommy Jean(-Paul Sartre) surgery.

I recommend that Sarah Connor change her name.

Gronk: *silently calculating*

The video won’t play at work. Please tell me there’s a HA-DUKE-KEN in there somewhere.

“Dont’u forget about me”

That’s already one too many. Stick to sports.

Oh yeah, you blend.

If it is fight or flight the penguins have only one option...

This administration could fuck up a two-car funeral.

Brett Favre and Little Brett Favre count?

Huh, lot of awful white people.

Garbage Time is the only thing worth watching on FS1. FUCK!

3. I’m, sucka

Feeding Thanksgiving dinner to refugees? That’s totally against the spirit of the holiday! IT’S FOR AMERICANS!!!

He’s Presumed Innocent, but that plane was a Clear and Present Danger to the jet. What if it had been Air Force One?! If I were a Witness, I’d be Frantic. What Lies Beneath that little plane... I mean, he could’ve been a Widowmaker.

stfu, idiot.