i loved Donahue. SO MUCH more interesting than any other daytime show.

Y'know what? I'll take the tone. They actually acted. That's what matters, IMO. A really well-written and contrite apology ain't shit if the offender stays employed or unpunished.

Kim Kardashian and Kris Jenner both have extremely low Q scores

OMG THAT MEANS THERE IS NEW HOPE FOR '50 SHADES OF BURT AND DOLLY'!!!!!!!!!!! YES!!! The universe is speaking to you, Hollywood film producers!! Listen and make art happen now!

Oh are we having a party? I brought juice boxes.

IF ONLY douchebags only had three annoying catchphrases. I'm just waiting for the predictable "people complaining about this ad are just fat, ugly and/or jealous!" followed by the inevitable non-apology, "sorry if anyone was offended!"

re: Vanessa Hudgens & grandmothers. I once asked my grandma what a steer was. She told me, 'it's a gentleman cow that something's been done to.'

Alan Thicke told his son Robin Thicke to "adopt a few Ethiopian kids" in order to get very famous. NOPE. But today we learned that apparently the tendency to use other human beings as props is genetic.

I love this kid so hard. Look at that gaze! He's got Bowie down cold.

Grossest bagel orders you've ever overheard? I had strong contenders with "salt bagel with American cheese" and "strawberry bagel with fresh mozzarella"...but then my husband overheard, "plain bagel with butter and a sprinkled packet of Splenda" and he took the crown.

I am so in awe of her, and so very afraid for her.

I am an Old, but I felt the same way. At least I can understand when it is remotely understandable, like Will.i.am.

Gross! I only watch the Kardashians on The Soup, so I missed that.

an unverified Facebook fan page (first warning sign)

I agree that Trawick is hot. But after seeing Kris come on to Brody Jenner on that boat, the image of her sharing edamame and feeding him sushi, is giving me PTSD.

Funny, I honestly had this cued up for if there was a weight-loss one. I'll share it with you, though, since we were thinking the same thing:

oh christ, really? weed socks? Are we 16 and got a gift certificate to Spencers?