My family’s dogs are TERRIFIED of my cat. They’re easily five times larger apiece.

There are three things no one wants to hear about, no matter how politely they may listen:

or be set loose in an arena most likely populated with underage girls. but yes, Taylor Swift is the dangerous one.

Anyone who refers to how much of a drug they just took as a “hero’s dose” probably shouldn’t be trusted to give viable opinions.... Just saying....

Is Father John Misty as much of a tool as he seems to come across as based on my limited knowledge of him gathered from blogs such as this, or am I just totally old and don’t get it?

Sometimes I’m stunned at the pain people walk around with every day and still manage to function.

“Topper” and “Tinsley” sounds like nicknames for pedigreed dogs. Or like brands of boat shoes. Rich people are fucking weird.

I'm super pale but if I do the turmeric at night I'm fine after washing my face in the AM.

Oh my goddess...we could actually start a birther movement! “Let’s see the paternity tests Donald! The LONG FORM ones now, with your full DNA sequence!”

My then 10 year old daughter asked about her grandparents ebing Catholic. It was before I talked about being an atheist with her. Her, “Why aren’t we Catholics?” Me, “They don’t let women become priest.” The look of horror and disgust on her little face made so proud. She never brougt it up again.

27 is the WORST. You start worrying about aging AND shit gets real regarding keeping up with your friends as they embark on their adult lives: “Wait, what? Susie bought a house?? Oh god, should I be buying a house?” “Jane is pregnant? Should I start having babies? If I don’t will be be infertile when I want to?”…

And they get six months in prison for it. But probably not even that because we wouldn’t want them to suffer and have “really difficult days.” Not like those delinquents serving 10 years for drug charges who couldn’t afford bail! /s

“New York” is a dog-whistle to white, Christian, socially conservative voters in large parts of the county. The listener gets to fill in their own prejudice(s) of choice. It’s the other side of the “Real America” type rhetoric that Palin was so fond of.

As opposed to Jesse Jackson. Who pretty much DID call New York…

You’re not the hero we deserve, but the one we need

I’m super proud of the camera girl who kept calling after the victim to see if she was okay.

Absolutely. She looked like she was unconscious for that moment and barely coming to when he yanked her to her feet.

Dude, if you’re going into rehab for a Bud Light habit; you weren’t trying very hard to begin with.

It’s definitely a joke, just not sure if it’s an intentional joke.

I agree, what the students don’t understand is that this sculpture has nothing to do with the fact they have an opportunity to graduate with a degree from Columbia. I mean its a statue of a blob, not something offensive, “technically”

Does it matter? When they’re underemployed in a decade’s worth of debt they’re going to wish they’d used their ridiculously expensive time at Columbia on literally anything else.