They don’t have room? Were you sending him home with the Harvard Classics 5 foot shelf? Who doesn’t have room for a Clifford the Big Red Dog book in their home?

Dude, it took me YEARS to get ungreyed. I don’t even know how it happened. I think I got popular (yes, this is a little like middle school) with my wit and gif usage, and now I’m ungreyed. Keep trying, JFD. You can do it.

I feel you friend! I just keep plugging away with my weird .gifs and medium fun stories. Someday...

HOW DARE YOU I HANG OUT IN THE GREYS ALL THE TIME I SEE THE MEAN THINGS YOU HAVE BEEN SAYING ABOUT ME

I still don't understand the idea of grey or not grey. Do stars help? I used to be grey all the time and then Jezebel started following me. Now I'm not grey all the time. Why did Jezebel start following me? What's happening? How did I get outside? I'm flying!!!

The greys are fun though! You get to say mean things about people on this forum without anyone knowing except others in the grey( most of the time anyways). It is like a secret society.

I see you and your thirst, in your grey desert, and I shall take pity on you.

I think Louis CK said that, by the time you’re 40, no one cares about you. They just expect you to do your job. That’s about right.

First timer. I booked a rental (basically like a small attached apartment) in St. X for our honeymoon. We had been to the island before and loved it - probably because we stayed at a nice hotel. Not this this time thanks to being broke from our backyard wedding and my being a cheap ass. So, we get to the apartment…

Our honeymoon was wonderful until our last night. It began as a lovely evening, we ate delicious food, drank entirely too many cocktails and retired to our hotel room around 2 am for some sexy time. We both passed out and the next thing I remember is being in an elevator on the fourth floor with the doors open. Our…

"My hamster was scared."

My brother and his (then) wife were already in town for our wedding. They were staying in the same hotel as my parents and my sister and all the other wedding guests. Come the wedding, though, they were a no-show and had checked out of the hotel. Asked for an explanation, he said "I forgot where the wedding was taking…

I tried to call in "ugly"once. I told my boss I had a cold sore that went wild and my face look very, well, damaged and, as the front desk person, I thought I should stay home. He had me come in any way, took one at look at me, and conceded that, yes, maybe I could have the day off.

Husband and I secretly eloped in Key West, came back with fancy new rings and coordinates of the beach we got hitched on.

My bf and I had been living together for almost a year. He came home from work one night all saucy and climbed into bed ready to get down.... and when I went down, I tasted another woman on him.

So at this place, everything tastes like ham?

When my dad was driving my brother, his friend and me home from school when I was in kindergarten, his friend was talking about how his class was having a Thanksgiving play. I thought to myself, "I want to be in a Thanksgiving play", so I chimed in that my class was having one too! I said that there were so many…

I was 8 years old when I went into my parent's bedroom one morning while my parents were still asleep and saw my Dad had a boner. I totally freaked out, woke my Mom up by dragging her out of the bed, and called 911 because I thought it was a chestburster from Aliens.

Day-um. My imaginary hat is off to you, sir.