The hottest nightclub in town is... HELL. It has everything: Saddam Hussein, KY super soakers, third leg warmers....

But you can’t forget the greatest Ascot look of all time

I have a mom like that. There’s no reasoning with the unreasonable and utterly delusional, because the person could turn on you forever for one ill-timed, well-intentioned intervention. Choices have to be made. I feel for Cliff and admire his resourcefulness. It feels shitty to be underhanded, but that’s a far better…

Didn’t the best man know that he was only imagining he was sick?

I had two bosses at Borders before I managed the place. One was legitimately insane and routinely threw books at me.

Can you even IMAGINE how jealous Titus is?

i know i speak for all of us when i say:

Kudos to the Steak & Shake waitress...a stupid question deserves that kind of answer.

Cheerio.

Tangent: Someone told me once that they could easily go gluten-free because they don’t even LIKE wheat bread. They only eat white bread.

What I don't masturbate to on Netflix would make a shorter list.

PEOPLE. YOU CAN STILL DOWNLOAD MOVIES AND SHOWS WITHOUT NETFLIX BUT HOW YOU GONNA DOWNLOAD THAT D

I voted for sex, for the off chance I ever have it again.

Well. Elizabeth Bennett also denied her relationship with Mr. Darcy to Lady Catherine de Bourg. So there.

Regarding periods, this is fantastic, and everyone should watch it:

A woman did it first.

My friend, who is legit Celiac, loves the "gluten-free" idiots. Why? It is because of them that the stores are now stocked with gluten-free aisles, and restaurants are now making special gluten-free dishes.