You contradicted his sexual identity. That ties directly into the ego.

They got to degrade someone.

As a 40+ year old man, I’m not even gonna try to argue against this. My wife used to be far more sexually aggressive than me and I thought that’s what I wanted. My old defense was that I just didn’t have enough in the tank. I couldn’t bounce back physically. And that was partially true. In truth, I just didn’t have…

Holy fucking shit, Tracy. I have struggled my whole life with these same concepts and types of experiences. Memory is shaped by the things that we want to be true, or that must be true, because of what is supposed to be true.

One thing I used to wonder about is what guys who got girls drunk or roofied them got out of the experience in a purely physical way—if your partner is literally passed out, they can’t be participating in any meaningful way.

I’ve been struck in recent years by similar thoughts about my adolescence: as far as sex and intimacy went, it really was a lose-lose situation. It was sort of the Paris Hilton/teen girl version of ‘having it all’: academic, athletic, or artistic achievements were great, but it was all ‘less than’ unless you were also…

Absolutely none of the men I’ve dated could keep up with me there, which was fine - I have no problem adjusting expectations, as that’s what you do in a relationship within reason - but any of the ones who claimed to “want” that from me had a ticking clock on them from how long it went from approval to sheer malice.…

Throughout my 40+ years being a woman in the United States, I’ve learned that men who say they want a woman who loves sex and asks for it are on par with the men who say they want an intelligent, independent, direct woman: soon after they get what they want, they don’t want it anymore because they don’t like it but…

I was pretty insulated from his movies growing up (my parents were never interested), but friends were super insistent that we watch (and enjoy) them, claiming they were some kind of artistic genius.

Seeing Manhattan on tv when I was in high school awakened some kind of feminist film critic in me. I was a geek who read the Beauty Myth and Ms. on my own, but that movie took it to a whole other level.

It was even creepier in some ways when he started casting replacement “hims” because he grasped that he was getting too grotesque and decrepit to pull the act off anymore. Watching actors who presumably didn’t want to get it on with thirteen year olds pretend these situations are normal is skin crawling.

This is what I just don’t get: not only have these allegations been public for some time (I remember reading about it what, like, 15 years ago at least?) but THIS IS WHO HE IS ON FILM because he is so completely self-absorbed that he can’t help but more or less use film as a medium to exorcise his demons, and somehow…

He even made a film where he was married to Mia Farrow and was cheating on her with a student (played by teenaged Juliette Lewis). He wrote it and filmed it while he was fucking Farrow’s teenaged daughter behind her back.

I doubt Pattinson could have shut it down (stan culture is bigger than the person at the center of it), but the meager visible effort on his part was heartbreaking. I hope he was a better partner in ways we aren’t privy too.

“We just have to stop asking that question. I know you’re asking it out of love, but I’m just going to make a stance and say that I’m not going to answer that question anymore because the question should really be to the abuser: Why are you holding someone hostage with abuse? And people say, it can’t have been that…

I’m the same in the never had an orgasm from anyone but myself, through specific type of clitoral stimulation. I’ve been with multiple people though, mostly but not all men. Every man has treated it as though once he’s orgasmed it’s over. Every single one of them would return to poor techniques that either hurt or did…

I suffered that side effect when I took SSRIs. Not only did the meds not help, but not being able to get off was just one more thing to be depressed about. When I brought my concern to my shrink, she asked in a stern voice “Is that really a problem for you?”

So much this. Coupled with so many bad sexual experiences, like where I felt pressured to do something that felt good for him but did nothing for me.

A more likely theory is that because sex has been so consistently unrewarding for so many straight women, they’re not responding positively to anything because there is no psychological reinforcement of this equal pleasure.