Wait what... hovering weakens the pelvic muscles? That explains why I can't have a violent sneeze without peeing. Shitty, that's the only way I can pee in public, seat cover or not.

Hmmmm... maybe Mitt Romney named his company after a Batman villain's company. I'm no comic book kid, but I heard of Bane before I heard of Bain. Rush Limbaugh makes me ashamed to be an American.

If you are embarrassed about the smell, dropping 1-2 drops of this magic shit BEFORE you go (that't the key) will mask almost any smell. Loud farting or splashing... you're on your own.

I vote both too! SNL is going to have to step it up next season with Andy & Kristen gone. It makes me sad thinking about it...

Or you can paint your nails and then sloppily paint the house, followed by a top coat. Same effect, yet much more productive.

Pic didn't work 1st time... the tube is so cute I had to share!

I wear this stuff (Tarte's Lights, Camera, Splashes!) and I love it! It's waterproof after it sets and gives nice full lashes without clumping. It's pricey, but what isn't nowadays?

Scary shit! A 14 year old girl was sexually assaulted in my hometown a few weeks ago in broad day light as well. It wasn't quite as brazen as this bicycle rider, but it happened right outside a busy high school on a really busy road. I know it's not always applicable in every situation, but I have a rule about this…

I wouldn't mind having this parking structure at my local mall, I have blasted my mirror on those fucking concrete pillars one too many times.

I smell a lawsuit. What do they do when people fly Southwest out of Las Vegas, put them in a sobering house like Cat Cora?

There's no way in hell Condi will get involved. She's way too smart.

Awwww... just emailed this to my 13 (holy shit!) year old niece. Her dad is raising her all by himself and I have been trying to help out by offering a woman's insight on stuff like bras, periods, and boys. It's been AWESOME birth control.

So everybody can be cranky mother fuckers at the same time... sounds like a lovely work environment.

As a victim of rape, I don't think it's funny to make jokes about rape. Though there was a pretty entertaining email about Jerry Sandusky's fate in prison, but that's different. As a fan of comedy and Tosh in particular, what did she expect to get for calling him out on that?

I couldn't find the pigment that's made up of all kinds of little freckles and moles that are varying in color and size or what I like to call forever on melanoma patrol. It sucks being a white girl who grew up in Hawaii...

I will need to catch that when school allows me to do some pleasure reading! I detest Twilight as well but my guilty pleasure are the Sookie Stackhouse novels (AKA True Blood).

I would love to find this bitch and give her a fat lip. This kind of shit is why young girls have so many body issue problems, they read shit like this on the internet and believe it.

This article is just like Magic Mike.... ATTN MALE STRIPPERS: women don't want to hear you talk.

I'm still a Tillamook girl for cheddar... but I haven't met a cheese I didn't meet unless it had a Z in it.

Mom used to soak my pacifier in beer to help me shut the fuck up.... I was a bad baby.