Worth a look: the abandoned remains of the Sandy Hook proving grounds at Fort Hancock. It's in Sandy Hook, NJ, at the northern tip of the Shore. Plus, it's right next to Gunnison Beach, the only official nudie beach in the northeast. Explore some ruins, get an all-over tan, and call it a day.

FINAL EDITION, PART III: THE AAALMOST FINAL-EST, AND WE MIGHT EVEN MEAN IT THIS TIME

The Real Jalop edition

Confederate Pride?

Up, Ginter,

[Seller]:Mr. Perkins, good morning, hurrahs80 with eBay in New York City. You recently responded to one of our ads. The reason I’m calling is that an extremely exciting investment opportunity crossed my desk today. Typically our firm lists no more than sixty thousand cars at any time: this is one of them. This Alpha…

I'm pretty sure that's a personal massager, dude.

Oppo would be disappointed if I didn't use this opportunity to post LADA PETER TURBO!

Have him paint this

The hell kind of window is that? Instead of three parts, it's a window with its own little window? Okay.

Video or it didn't happen.

Howard's Gas Station in Shiner, Texas (As in Shiner Beer)

No doubt.

... 1920 Mixwell engine! '22 Dudge body! '23 Paclac axles! Wheels off a lawn mower! But it runs!

Don't ever call my engine shitty. It's part of my car. It's part of what gives my car the character it has. When you insult the stock engine, you insult the car as a whole and therefore you insult me, the owner of said car. Disrespecting an otherwise awesome car because you feel the stock engine is wholly inadequate…

Holy crap! I sell one car, and then the perfect next car comes up for sale!

...so where are my renderings of the C8 Corvette, Matt?

Since when are we a crazed cult? And why haven't I gotten my standard issue hooded robe and sacrificial wrench?

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAHHAA

He has gone old and senile and in between the ramblings of POWAAAAAAAAA, he spends his time remembering the good memories he had with his Ford GT.