If it was, they’d spell it Dat B!llion@ire. That’s how you tell the difference.

Shruggie is gender fluid.

OHHHHHHH! I didn’t even notice “pos” was crossed out! Long week. Thank you.

WAT

OMG, I’ve been misgendering Shruggie all this time!

And here I thought it was Fanny Farmer.

I feel dumb. Tell me?

Who will play Shruggie? John Krasinski?

I’m so, so sorry. That brought tears to my eyes. I just... fuck. I’m sorry.

Oh honey. My husband used to work there. His favorite customer quote: “I am going to cut myself and bleed all over you if you don’t do this for me.”

That’s what kills me; I think Sandy knew that and was narrating for the camera. She did everything right, she did everything she could, and it still wasn’t enough to save her life.

I really admire your commitment. I’d give you an amazing star gif, but I don’t want to steal randilyn’s thunder.

Can I call Star-Lord, then?

New name! Did you finally concede to adultosaur?

The only chore I’ve found that they find fun, and is actually helpful, is to give them a wet sponge and have then clean baseboards. Try it!

I’m pretty sure both my husband and I said, “Awww, damn it!” when he showed up onscreen during the trailer.

And then they keep driving, holding the newborn’s soft spot like an inch from the dashboard! I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt and assuming they were in shock and not thinking clearly, but that had me biting my nails.

Try having a boy child and playing Motley Crue or Guns N Roses in the car. Ughhhh, why did I listen to that shit???

Can the Massachusetts attendees throw their tea into a nearby body of water and just drink boxed Pinot Grigio instead? If yes, please sign me up.

Someone needs a ferry ticket!