I see it now. But when you get one and you need a moment of whimsy tell yourself that little heart is full of pineapples.

I JUST HAVE A BIG. LESBIAN. CRUSH ON YOUOUUIU

It looks like pineapples. Are pineapples a Scottish symbol of love?

Every kiss will begin with Kay if they make a necklace that IS shaped like the Lochness monster and somebody gives it to me.

Did his hairdresser rip the sunglasses off the back of his head and smash them? Because that is what I want to do everytime I watch that show.

That's why I also do not take offense when he says I look like Lena Dunham, but that he would still go for drinks sometime. Whether or not you like her work, her face, or Lena Dunham herself, she still wouldn't go out with this fella either.

Naked dudes on covers is the only way I am gonna start buying magazines instead of stealing the old ones from my therapist's office.

I think it was based on the fact that I am very very fair and have very dark hair and dark hooded eyes. I also do not know if curly hair is supposedly part of the "Jewish" look but my hair went through a massive curly frizzy phase when I started puberty.

I felt like saying something cuz he seems nice even if he is not bright, but I think sometimes people just gotta have something and hold onto it. Like a girl told him he looks like a celebrity and that makes him feel good and whatever.

Since I was kind of naive as far as racism and anti-semitism goes it kind of plagued me for years as to what "looking Jewish" meant. I kept wondering if people could tell I was Catholic by looking at me.

There is a guy at my community college who I run into outside the school on a smoke break, he tells me that a lot of girls think he looks like Jared Leto. One time I asked him who said that and he said a stripper told him. I nearly swallowed that cigarette. Not that he is bad looking, but saying that you think you…

I would vomit too, but only because like Jenner sisters I am a teenaged alcoholic.

I relate to this, I'm twenty and I feel like a lot of people my age feel like they are missing out when they don't get to instantly record a real life experience. Like whether it was something cool or something mundane, ya just gotta make sure everybody knows about it. It's the "if a tree falls in the forest" effect.

Quick! Somebody who knows Shakespeare better than me, Who should Arnold Shwartzenerwhateveryouspellit's loveson play?

My guy totally would made a move on you, because I do not even have light eyes or hair.

Where is my bagel going to come out?

Yes, yes I am. If society starts looking at fat people as just as lazy or productive like thin people based on their own individual personalities, I WILL HAVE TO ADMIT I JuST HAVE A LAZY SoUL.

When I was in junior high the only compliment a boy gave me was, "You don't even look Jewish." Which I had no idea you could or could not look Jewish.

Or just start using society's prejudices to your own advantage.

Ok, cool, now make her into a toaster. FOUR SLICE! Waist size be damned.