Holy shit, does that tongue have a ball gag?

I wonder where you are moving. If it is the country next door to me (could qualify), you can at least escape to this fairly magical place on occasion I hope.

Not the finish I expected. Well done.

I'm just going to share this story from last Saturday. A good money-making night- the restaurant is packed, we're trying to turn over tables. Of course half of them are fucking campers. So when another 8 top of 40 something year olds roll in, I'm begging my manager to give them to me. Bright eyed and with an imaginary…

Oh God, fuck these people.

"I really hate to be that guy and to stick up for coffee latte lady"

I am gonna guess it comes from being spoiled by their parents. Rather than being told "You will eat the spaghetti cause that is all the food there is", their mom would probably go out and buy them some damn chicken nuggets if they demanded them just because they asked. So now they expect the whole world to cater to…

This will never get old.

You did that poached egg thing last week, C.A., and I am just now feeling the gagging ease up.

He goes on to explain that every time a "waitress" does something he doesn't like, he takes a dollar off the stack and puts it back in his wallet. According to him, this guarantees EXCELLENT "waitress" behavior. He ends it with, "And it doesn't matter anyway, we live in [a state] where the restaurant has to pay them…

Obviously the steak fajitas had not been grilled enough. The longer you grill them, the more tender they become. Look it up.

And the Oscar for Bestest Use Of A Kitchenette Inside Joke in a Horrible Customer Story goes to ...

Monogrammed Thermosery

I want a goddamn coffee latte in a goddamn monogrammed thermos right now!!!! And God help you if there's any red in there because I'm allergic to red!

Yes random commenter guy I will be sure to take your clearly studied opinion of the facts over that of actual economists.

This repeatedly-raised point is such a crappy false equivalency. "But then who will I get to look down on?!"

You know I can't say no to you.

If tax laws arent enforced with violence, why did the NYPD murder eric garner? racism? is the black police Sargent that was in charge on the scene racist too? I'm not saying it's impossible but is that what you believe?