We put sedatives in their milk bones. They may be a while.

This is a very good article Mark about very important topics.

Ahhhhhh ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Rachel Dolezal is the gift that keeps on giving. This might even be funnier than the time she told a Latina student to shut up about race because she (the student) didn’t look ethnic enough.…

That cat is terrible. Why is it so moist?

No, it’s real.

I WILL WAIT FOR THE GROUPON.

I have two dollars and 17 cents. Final offer.

I’d guess this is a myostatin-related genetic mutation, like that enormously muscle-bound whippet that was the internet’s favorite LOLWUT a while back.

I'm sexually aroused.

FACT: The best non-alcoholic drink is ginger ale, and ginger ale + lemonade is much much much better than an Arnold Palmer.

BBQ Ribs are #1 on all food lists.

There is no pie on this list, terrorist.

Do you WANT muffin tops? Because that’s how you get muffin tops.

BLOCKED.

At least the comic’s good.

This makes me think of Patton Oswalt's accidental stumble upon an orgy when house hunting.