Good Lord, if you were going to drop her anyway, don’t like her friends, refused to be part of the plannng, and already threw a tantrum, my guess is you only want to go to the wedding to make some kind of point, to hurt her feelings, or to stir up some drama that focuses on you. Do everyone, especially the bride, a…

I get what you are saying and I live in a country where our police don’t have guns but a guy on trial knocked down a female prison officer who was transporting him from court and then kicked her in the head enough times to kill her recently. Some people will do anything to cause harm, that being said guns make the…

I used Somewhere Over the Rainbow (the Iz version). My sister had already used it in her wedding, but there aren’t a lot of options.

Well, yeah. They're fancy people who can't drink regular tap water. Or their McMansion was built on the site of a former dump or brownfield where the water's already contaminated with god knows what. Because New Jersey.

If you think the couple’s first dance is bad, it has nothing on the first dance with the parent (like bride with dad). Trying to pick music for that is a dreadful reminder that every single song ever is about fucking. Every. Single. Song.

They’re Mexican wolf people. The hairline is a dead giveaway.

This post comes from a place of love and if you don’t get it:

I’m not having a first dance, but the song I was going to choose was Rainbow Connection, because it’s got really nice lyrics but it’s also being sung by a puppeteered frog and the Muppets are the fucking best. So that might be irreverent enough for him? While still making someone’s grandmother cry for sure? Also it’s…

Why are you going at all?

Don’t go to the wedding. Seriously.

We used At Last at our wedding.... 15 years ago.

Can we go back to where your cousin was stashing fentanyl patches in a VS bag in the house? This sounds... not... kosher...

Fuck it...fuck it...so fucking done with all this. Every week, every day, nothing changes. People keep dying senselessly, nothing gets done, nothing changes. Meanwhile some muppet that’s been left in an oven is running for president. Just fuck it.

I wonder if there will be thoughts and/or prayers offered up.

To me, her “calmness” was very similar to the way a horse trainer speaks to a spooked and dangerous animal. She couldn’t risk setting Officer Triggerhappy off on herself or her daughter.

It doesn’t matter what she would have done. If she had been hysterical they would have said she was putting on a show for the cameras.

When you’ve got a preconceived notion of how something is supposed to play out, suddenly everything looks ‘fishy’.

I know you’re not a troll but you’ve never heard the name Chaka Khan before? Really? She’s been around since the 70s. Tell Me Something Good? I Feel For You? Ain’t Nobody? Ok, how about Whitney Houston’s I’m every Woman? That was a remake of a Chaka song (hence the shout out at the 4:31 and 4:35 marks)?

2 African Americans, a Latina, a Jewish woman, and a white woman. Super pumped about the diversity of this group. There’s no way they won’t win all of the medals.