Unwashed post-Crossfit taint Donald Trump*.

My cousin has been shown being arrested on local news twice this year which means he too has been on tv more than David Spade.

I loved Navy. I can still smell it.

There is an nth dimension beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as inane as modern art and as timeless as plaid shirts. It is the middle ground between Starbucks and artisanal beer, between ancient aliens and new age cures, and it lies between the pit of man’s ignorance and the summit of his beard. This…

I hope she comes home covered in prison tattoos like Max Cady in “Cape Fear”. Doubting she learned to read the way he did tho.

woah yogurtman needs to leave sour cream alone before he gets beat.

He later turned his attention to the enemy of all yogurtmen, sour cream, and declared that it “has no reason for being.”

So, Obama’s state-issued “Certification of Live Birth” wasn’t good enough, but Trump promises medical records and we just get a doctor’s note.

I think if I were in the physical presence of Amy Poehler, I would just weep. And everyone would feel uncomfortable.

Agreed. Here’s Bjorn.

He says what I’m thinking!

A very good friend of mine worked at The Sports Club/LA, a high-end gym in Westwood. One of the regular patrons on his shift was a woman who claimed to have been on Prince’s booty call list in the late ‘80s. The phone would ring:

BUT THE BAG

So, if you admit that everyone’s experience is different, why are you judging hers?

Last time I checked 17 and 18 were still numbers in their teens and the word teenagers had no gender.

I remember that ham! That was considered very fancy!

He could cure cancer and they’d bitch about him putting oncologists out of work.

I would have gone back and bought it when we weren’t together, then worn it to every family function for the next year.

Sometimes I want real Mexican, sometimes I want Chipotle. I don’t pretend there’s any crossover between the two.