Every single word that comes out of Shailene Woodley's mouth:

The perfect ironic hell for conspiracy nuts would be a world in which everything they believed in is true.

I sure hope so. What a stupid fucking thing to be offended by.

I was kinda shocked, too. But I liked it! I also didn't expect how sweet Max was in this week's episode (and last week's Untucked.) I'm starting to like her after thinking at the start that I'd find her really annoying.

* Which really begs the question of why they're not called America Geese.


Hey man, we have our wiley side.

But really. Those geese are fuckin dicks. They liked to hang around the front doors of my college atrium. It was hilarious to see grown adults walk outside and just stop dead in their tracks, staring down a…

Personality-wise, Ginger is in the lead for my fav queen of the season. But Violet can GTFO.

There's a special place in hell for women serial killers who don't help other women serial kill.

YEESSSSSSSS Drag Race coverage on Jezebel!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can we do this every week????

He probably wasn't just on a sleeping pill. He probably had a slew of chemicals in his system. Then again- "going to rehab" is pretty much the first thing rich lawyers have their clients do when there's trouble. They get unfettered access to them, and the mighty wall of HIPAA comes down to protect the client's…

Snowballs, obv.

Justified's current season has me terrified of Mary Steenburgen in any context.

I watch a lot of Snapped and ID channel (I love it...) and the young women usually don't stick it out that long if the money is the end game. If he indeed didn't require a pre-nup, then she's already gotten phase one of the plan down. Now she just needs a little longer, like 2 years at best, before she pulls the rug…

Starring for the obvious auto-correct error that made me think, for a brief moment, that your father's vendor friend (an employee of Aramark, maybe?) did a movie with full-frontal peen.

I could only star your post once, so I got you all these other stars.

It's funny (sad) how often this gif is appropriate.

Equal pay is reverse discrimination. We white men are used to receiving a 23% premium. To deny us this premium is to punish us with a pay-cut simply because we have a penis.

I immediately distrust anyone who even uses the term political correctness.

There's probably a Starbucks in the wheel wells of every minivan built after 2008. There is NO excuse for requesting Starbucks coffee at a non-Starbucks.