Salt meet wound.

This hurts me to read.

My brother and I used to fight for those. And I was a biter, so you know it got ugly.

I think Beer Mug doesn’t bother me because I lived thru the Tad years in late 90's. He was the worst. After that, I can handle almost any other moron.

Some of the Liam Neeson jokes are brilliant in their simplicity. My all time fave is “LNC is so big it has type II diabetes.” I laughed so hard at that one that I almost drove off the road.

What went down with Lisa May? I feel like she was just gone one day and no one ever mentioned her again.

If I went to a dinner party at your house I would steal that and we could never be friends again because things would be awkward. But I would have an awesome wall hanging.

I think some of the women I work with have bladders the size of watermelons. The stream is so forceful and so long. Then there’s me with my hamster bladder just trickling away.

The Armenian Comedian and Doto are even worse. Their voices are like nails on chalkboard to me. I don’t mind 98.7 too much. The Craigslist Freaks and Friday Fail stories are amusing. But I can’t stand when they talk about politics because that one guy is just so freakin’ smug.

Same about Kevin & Bean. I adore Ralph but hate Hotline to Heaven. And the Wheel of Animal Voices or whatever that bit is called. But I like their interviews and Ralph’s Hollywood news. I have been listening for so many years, it might just be out of habit now because I get a much better Ralph fix with the Hollywood…

They were completely impractical because they made the pencil so top heavy. But cute ALWAYS trumps practical in my world.

Wow, what a flashback. I bought so many of those as a kid.

I swear, I am laughing with you, not at you. But laughing so hard at this.

It’s a good thing I wasn’t the one that found him. Because within 10 minutes I would have named him and knitted him a sweater. Then when the authorities came to take him away, I would be like Elliot in E.T. screaming, “But he’s mine! He picked me!”

I would kick a puppy to get to do that. (Not hard, maybe just enough to make it yelp a little. But I would totally do it.)

Because cardboard hurts. And Pearls are perfection. And if they ever take them off the market, I will riot in the fucking streets.

Adler was so hard to watch on that show. His mother is awful and he just seemed so starved for love. I began to notice that whenever he saw Dr Drew, he always greeted him with a hug or some other physical affection. I hope he stays sober.

I just posted about Kohl’s, too. Their clearance section rocks hard.

If there is a Kohl’s near you, run, don’t walk. They have surprisingly cute/pretty bras and their clearance section is awesome. I rarely pay more than $10 for a good quality bra there. Their Apt 9 has some pretty, sexy choices. Everything there is always on sale, but ther clearance section is amazing.

The girl on the far left is killing me. She is rocking her grandma’s hairdo. She looks like she just came from her grandmother’s beauty parlor and knows they made her look like the littlest 102 yr old woman alive. (Maybe I am projecting because that happened to me when I was her age.)