Accidentally publishing that was accidentally awesome because it reads like a "fill in the blank." My answer is "ass boils."

And she was so beautiful just as herself. Profiler was a friggin' great show and she looked amazing in it. She was aging well on her own. I hate that she felt the need to do that to her face.

Then everyone must think I am a raging bitch 24/7 because I just can't make myself use "text speak." So all my texts are punctuated and capitalized properly. I see no need to change this.

I don't profess to know any inside info, but I got the impression from her Dr Phil interview that she and Amanda aren't besties. Amanda got the "best" (for lack of a better word here) treatment, and Michelle seemed a little resentful of that, understandably. Also, it seemed like Amanda didn't really believe that…

That was the exact impression I got of her, too. She won't be solving quantum physics problems any time soon, but she has street smarts and survival instincts like a jungle cat. And those skills likely saved her life. I have nothing but admiration and respect for her. And next time I am bitching about some random…

I love bacon and I love Bloody Marys, but my brain is not letting me marry those things together. I put some so much celery and cucumbers in mine, they practically become a salad. Or so I tell myself.

After this, I went and checked out some of the clubs (there are so many!) and you get A LOT of bacon in some. And of course, now I want to join a few. The internet is bad, bad news.

If had bacon delivered monthly to my house, Richard Simmons would have to come and shout encouraging words while the city cut down a wall to pry me out. That's how that would end.

What? You will puke on them? Because that seems kind of inevitable.

I watched the 2 hours of her interview on Dr. Phil last month. He set up a donation page for her. After watching the first hour, I donated. I don't care if she spends the money on tattoos, piercings or candy. Those women should not have to worry about money for the next decade, at least. And I hope Castro spends…

They are just asking to get served a sneezer.

Maria Bello and Terri Polo could be twins as far as my brain is concerned. I always, always mix those 2 up.

I know I can name at least 3 lesbian celebrities, but if you put a camera in my face, chances are I will forget my own middle name. I feel like some of those people probably could have named more, but cameras make some people stupid, myself included.

That Vine of Dita's cat is TERRIFYING until you know what it is. I saw the end before the beginning and might not get over that.

The Dina Lohan story made me thing of something the ever fabulous Candace deLong of Deadly Women said about a murderer on a recent episode. "She was a Disneyland of pyschiatric disorders."

You. Beautiful you. You are my soul mate.

Last year, I had the chance to touch one of the actual Kermits from the Henson Workshop. Not gonna lie. I cried.

I can't identify some of them because the pic is small and they look so amazing glammed up like that.

I love. And Seven Psychopaths was even better. Best movie I saw last year, for sure.

I just did it this weekend and I freakin' love it. I have never been happier with my hair in all my life.