PEOPLE, THIS IS 'SMIZING.' THIS IS IT.
Only Mr. Siggins knows the truth about his alleged journalism credentials . We simply do not know the circumstances of Dustin Siggins's supposed credentials, education, or basic humanity.
My partner is 6'4" and a feminist - could I, should I use this study to shame him into doing more of the housework?
(puts hand on abdomen, laughs at international speculation regarding uterus)
Oh for god's sake. All of our spirit days in high school were usually based on something harmless, like different decades. OMG, WEAR A POODLE SKIRT AND CAT EYE GLASSES! OMG, WEAR TIE DYE AND JOHN LENNON GLASSES! OMG, CRIMP YOUR HAIR AND WEAR GIANT SHOULDER PADS! (Of course I never participated, because angst.) In an…
1. Get rid of your shitty artwork
That's not scary. The ghost is obviously friendly. It just wanted to hold the cameraman's hand, and even closed the door when asked! Check your corporeal privilege, Mark.
Oh! you just reminded me of when my friend in college said she wanted her head shaved and would I do it. I went and got my razor and shaving cream and came back. She freaked out - "I didn't want it smooth!! I just wanted it BUZZED!! Like super-short but not SMOOTH!!" I was so excited about getting to shave a girl's…
I am also happy to have survived that time period and grown into a reasonably adjusted adult. Only a few battle scars and no permanent criminal activity on my record.
Around the same time, I shaved a man (one of Spooky's besties) who was tripping on dex. He said he was too hot and he needed to not have any chest hair. It did not go well. There's more where that came from.
I want to read more stories about your hardXcore 17 year old days because you perfectly captured what it is like to be that age (and that badass, of course). God, I'm so glad I made it through being 17.
Oh no, not Juggalos. That makes this story infinitely better (or worse, depending on how you look at it.)
"are you from south jersey" made this story 10x funnier
are....are you from south jersey by any chance? i think i may have bought drugs from that guy sometime around 2004.
It's a spade because obv I was hardXcore at 17 years old. Used to hang out with a 20-something Juggalo who had the hots for me and maybe/maybe not traded some BJs for beer. He had a 'tattoo artist' friend who owed him a 'favor' (drug money) and was like "omg grl i can hook you up with a free tat ilu." Being a very…
I have a tattoo of Larry David. It's his head on an ant body. I call it "Larry David the piss ant".
I knew a guy once who had the classic drunken blackout tattoo moment, except that when he woke up with a brand new mystery tattoo, his was beautiful and said "Karate Explosion" in gorgeous script with pretty curlicues and stuff. Did he do karate? No he did not. Does he know where he got the tattoo? No he does not.…