Lol it is a mouthful, but a lot less complicated than it sounds. I do recommend the popcorn by itself though, so good :-)

OH GOD. I haven’t even finished reading but that Funky Town story has brought actual tears to my eyes.

I would have thought Colonel Sanders would be a breast man.

This is only tangentially a food story, but it ends up in a Starbucks, so there you go.

Oooh! This will be missed because of my evergray status, but I have seen the collection of trepanned skulls at the Mutter Museum in Philly and it is gruesome! Some of those holes weren’t made with fancy drills - cross hatching on the skulls shows that someone took a blade to the head repeatedly and hoped for the best.…

I am looking to hire cooks and waitstaff for my newest restaurant - Punchie’s This Is How We Serve It.

I take it very seriously. Without that “chemical manipulation” I would’ve lost my ovaries to PCOS years back. Definitely not sexy. Neither is unplanned pregnancy or any of the other painful conditions the BCPs can treat. Humans intentionally alter the ways their bodies function all the time, since time immemorial.…

When “Se7en” first used the conceit of the killer metal dildo, they did NOT show the rape scene itself— they just showed a Polaroid photo of the weapon, after the fact, and that was enough to make absolutely everyone scream and squirm. That is how you do horror!

“So, your table stopped me and asked what kind of fish they had was because they thought you were lying to them; I told them it was cod and they asked why we didn’t have real fish.”

I saw this on Prudie the other day and couldn’t believe the comments that thought it was totally ok and not creepy. If I was this guy’s wife and he told me the real story behind our initial meeting I would reevaluate our entire relationship through that lens, wondering what other weird stuff had gone on unbeknownst to…

Also, note that for this subject in particular, the employee really has to have screwed up in a unique and interesting way for anyone to have a reason to care about the story. If you specifically requested a sandwich with no mayo, and a server then brought you a sandwich with mayo on it, well, I’m very sad for you,…

The soup of the day is usually Hitler miss, but I’m sure you’ll just Goebbels up today’s gestapo soup.

They never took a doggie bag home and they never touched Golem Jesus’s meal.

It came out too dark! Breakfast is RUINED!

It kind of looks like she’s got bike shorts on underneath.

Marry Tay’s sparkle houndstooth because hello, sparkle houndstooth. At first I hated it but now I kinda love it? Would have liked it more on Rihanna tho.

I basically babbled. Something along the lines of, “I’m so glad he has such an open minded and loving family, but I’m not a sex worker and I really only know him from the amazing stories my new coworkers tell me. I’m so sorry for your loss, and I’m sure I would’ve loved him but maybe not that way but maybe that way…