Don't worry, there are many other places to hide drugs on/in your body. :)

My dog went into the kitchen once, pulled out an empty chili container from the trash and brought it back to us. She plopped down in front of us and started to work on licking out the chili leavings. Like "HOW YOU GUYS DOIN'; I GOT CHILI." When we tried to take it from her she was like "EXCUSE ME, ASSHOLES THAT IS…

I'm convinced my dogs think their name is the sound of the cheese drawer opening and the bag rustling. I can yell "spunkie" all day and get noting but if the fridge opens they're there stat.

Highly abbreviated/random poop list:

You are entitled to your opinion, but it is wrong. :)

I am still waiting for Harold and Kumar and Cheech and Chong. The universe will not be right until that movie is made. Why are they not doing it yet?!?!

I'm sorry. I have friends who are also dealing with fertility issues/miscarriages and have had to cut themselves off from Facebook because of the onslaught of baby-related posts. It's totally valid to need to distance yourself a little at the reminder of pain you've experience, even if you want to be happy for this…

I spent from 10 am to 430 shopping, cooking and cleaning while my husband played golf and watched football. He got high then snaked our drain (that is not a euphemism), but couldn't screw the drain trap cover back on and asked for my help. And he had left gobs and gobs of gross hair and other nasties in the drain, so…

Whahaha!

Wait...what? And here was me thinking that was why more than half of it seems skewed way too far to the right most of the time.

Has he harassed them over where baby iPhones are born, too?

Eh, it's complicated when you get into food. Cigarettes are easy- no one needs to smoke. It's a no brainer. Everyone needs to eat, though. Certainly healthier options needs to be provided, but what is healthier varies depending on the person. Some people need calorie dense, easily digested foods.

I agree. I can't even imagine the amount of terrible things that he was saying about her to prompt them to make that call. I hope she considers hiring some type of security for the time being.

The Sarah Hyland item is so scary. When an employee at a rehab center calls and tells you to get a restraining order, there must have been some seriously fucked shit happening. I hope she stays safe.

Hey, I resemble that remark!

that rabbit's dynamite!